Coming Home to You
When I sleep, I hardly ever dream. The few times that I do, the images and sounds make me feel unsettled, as if I don't have a tight enough grip on my own mind to keep myself from falling into a state of uncontrolled fantasy. At the big turning point in my life that I'd just come across, there was every reason why I should have experienced dreams when Duo and I fell asleep in each other's arms, and I actually did. By all rights, I should have found myself in the middle of the most pleasant dream possible, because Duo had given me the ability to feel more pleasure than I'd ever imagined in the waking world. I think I even tried to form my scattered dreams into some kind of happy scene, but something in my mind just wouldn't allow that.
I was in the cockpit of Wing, finishing a mission that had apparently gone well in terms of the destruction of the target military base. Now I was simply waiting, sweating and trembling with every second that I waited there on the flaming, empty battlefield. I was waiting for Deathscythe to appear, and to hear Duo's cheerful voice over the com link telling me that all had gone according to plan. He did not come, and though I didn't remember starting to cry in the dream, my face suddenly felt hot and wet. I scrubbed at my eyes to brush off the many trails of tears. Forgetting that my cover would be completely blown if I moved from my current position, I moved Wing into action and tore through the flames and destruction, searching for Duo.
Wing was easily spotted by the enemy when I did this, and I suddenly had to fight off another score of mobile suits while still frantically searching for my partner. I was violently afraid that I'd find Deathscythe lying among the heaps of scorched and destroyed metal of the former base, but I never did. My frenzied search went on without end. I wouldn't give up until I found Duo, but he was not there. Gone, simply vanished as though he'd never been with me on the mission at all.
I cried out in pain, not realizing that I'd done the same with my real voice, and the next sensation I felt was the most welcome thing in the universe. Duo's gentle hands were on my shoulders, shaking me awake.
As I found reality again, I noticed just how worried he sounded. I knew perfectly well that it had been a dream, but I was so relieved to see Duo that I gathered him in my arms in half a second and pressed my lips to his in a passion filled kiss. He returned it gladly, but when we pulled reluctantly apart, I could see that his eyes were still filled with concern.
"Did you have a nightmare?"
I nodded, running my hands in slow patterns over his back. Duo gave a sigh of contentment and molded his warm, naked body to mine. He was quiet then, waiting for me to tell him more about the dream.
"I was on a mission," I started. My voice was hoarse and uncertain, a quality which it never usually had. "I..."
When I paused, I felt Duo's hands come up to slowly caress my face several times before settling on the back of my neck. 'He's trying to reassure me,' I thought, gaining a bit more confidence.
"I was looking for Deathscythe, but I couldn't find you anywhere. I don't know if you died on the mission, but I couldn't find you." I took a long breath and looked at Duo with serious eyes. "It scared me. I've never... I've never been scared in that way before."
Duo leaned forward and brushed his lips against mine. I closed my eyes and was about to deepen the kiss, but he spoke before I got the chance.
"Heero, I'm not going anywhere," he said against my lips. "I'll be here for as long as you want me."
"That's a big promise," I noted, taking his mouth in mine for a brief moment. "Because I want you forever. If you tell me something like that, Duo, you'll never be rid of me."
"Good," he smiled, eyes lighting up. But just as quickly, his face fell again. "But... what if the scientists assign us on different missions? They've done that in the past; we haven't always been together at safehouses like we are now."
I thought about that for a second. The fear of my dream came back, and I imagined just how awful it would be to not only be unable to find Duo, but to know that he was very far away from me, on another mission where I couldn't possibly protect him if something went wrong.
"I don't give a damn what the scientists want us to do," I said fiercely, suddenly driven to anger. For my whole life, I had done everything that was expected of me, and being the Perfect Soldier had been every part of my existence. Now, for the first time, I wanted something for myself, and I would be damned if someone tried to take it from me. I had only just acknowledged the fact that Duo and I were supposed to be together, but thoughts of our lovemaking hardened my resolve to fight for the sudden wash of emotion that had changed me forever. "I'm going to make it clear to Dr. J that if he doesn't pair us together all the time from now on, he can just say good-bye, because the two of us will run away from it all."
Duo pulled away slightly and sat up on the couch, violet eyes wide with shock.
"Heero! You'd really do that? I thought the missions were the most important thing in the world to you!"
I nodded. "They are." He looked a little disappointed at this, so I moved to correct myself, realizing he didn't know exactly what I meant by that.
"The missions are everything, Duo. But the mission has changed. Now there is nothing more important than my mission to protect you... to make sure we are always together." I swallowed heavily. "Would you do that? Will you run away from everything with me if they force us to be apart?"
"Yes, I will."
I smiled, but there was something else important that I'd just remembered.
"Duo, early this morning, you were crying out in your sleep."
He didn't say anything at first, but I could tell by his face that he remembered the bad dream he'd been having pretty clearly.
"You said 'Heero, don't leave me.'" I touched his face softly and he finally looked me in the eye.
"Why did you say that, Duo? Was it anything like my dream?"
"Kind of," he admitted. "I had no idea that you liked me, Heero. I thought you probably considered me a friend, but... I was always so afraid we'd be assigned on different missions and you'd never care enough to take the trouble to see me again."
"Duo, I'm not going anywhere," I said, repeating his promise to me. "I'll be here for as long as you want me."
He grinned. "You've just signed yourself away for life, Heero."
"That's right. I belong to you now," I said seriously, wondering at the fact that it was easy to give so freely to him. I smirked as my thoughts turned back to the desire for another joining of our bodies. "Now that you've got me, what are you doing to do with me, Duo?"
A lustful gleam entered his eyes and his hands moved down to cup my ass and grind my body against his. My reawakening erection pressed directly against Duo's and I moaned, needing him to touch me everywhere. I couldn't help it, and I had to tell him.
"Duo, I need you to take me." I had to stop for a moment and catch my breath, because now I could feel a cool teardrop of pre come from Duo's cock sliding against my own hardening length. "I need you to show me that you want me."
"Don't say it," I whispered, running my hands over every part of Duo I could reach. "Show me. Fuck me."
His eyes were impossibly wide with shock, but also with desire.
"Duo, I need to see what your face looks like when you're coming inside me."
I kissed and licked along the column of Duo's slender throat as I spoke. He squirmed and made soft sounds of pleasure, and when I glanced up I saw that his face was flushed.
All at once I realized that although Duo had used his amazing tongue to clean his own passion from my stomach, I felt sweaty and a little sticky.
"How about a shower?" I asked, kissing him once more just below his ear.
He smiled and nodded.
"And I get to wash you, Duo."
He leaned up to kiss me, and I gathered him in my arms without breaking the contact of our lips. I stood and finally pulled my face away, only because I had to be able to see the path to the bathroom. When we reached the shower I reluctantly lowered Duo to the ground. He surprised me by putting on a pouty expression. Without giving me time to reach around him and turn on the shower, he pressed up against me, lining up our erections and kissing me savagely. I moaned into his mouth and fumbled around blindly for the hot water knob. I managed to turn it on while accepting the pleasurable assault.
I pinned Duo against the wall and kissed back harder, occasionally sticking my hand under the water to see if it had heated up enough. When it did, I pulled Duo with me into the jets of water, opening one eye so I could guide him without ending the kiss again.
For quite awhile we just stood there with the hot water pouring over both of us, still locked at the lip. After it started, I couldn't remember who I was anymore, and I didn't care. I was lost in Duo. I explored his mouth with my tongue, memorizing the details, the touches and caresses within a simple kiss that he liked best. I discovered that he made a sexy sound of pleasure every time I let the tip of my tongue slide around his lower lip. I learned that Duo seemed to lose himself in rapture when I buried my hands in his now wet hair and kissed him slowly, with all the emotion I could gather and then press into a physical action. If there was anything left of the stoical and unfeeling Heero Yuy that I had tried to be before admitting my feelings to Duo, that kiss wiped it away.
When the moment ended, Duo wrapped his arms around me. I returned the embrace, and snaked one hand around his back to retrieve the shampoo. I poured a large amount in my hand and began working it into Duo's amazingly long hair. He moaned when my hands began to massage his scalp.
"You like that?" I whispered.
"Yeah," he nodded appreciatively, arching into my touch.
I worked up a good lather of soap in his hair and moved Duo under the shower head to wash it away. Smiling, he reached for the shampoo bottle and did the same to my hair, though it took a lot less time to lather.
Duo washed the soap out for me, and then I took a step towards him. My erection, which had never really faded, pressed right against Duo's thigh, and he took in a sharp breath. I looked down with a smirk and saw that he was just as aroused and ready to play. Without saying anything, I pushed him gently against the shower wall. I figured he would need something to support himself when he felt what I was about to do.
I started kissing down his chest, pausing to tease each of his nipples with my tongue and relish his urging cries for more. I smiled and licked a line down his stomach. I got down on my knees and heard Duo's panting breath over the noise of the shower. He obviously knew what I was going to do next.
I had never done this before, but I imitated the way Duo had touched me before. I grasped the base of his cock and brought my mouth just over the tip. My tongue flicked out to caress the burning flesh just below the head, and I listening intently to Duo's reactions to determine what felt good to him.
He moaned loudly and his cock pulsed against my tongue. The sexy sounds and sensations went straight to my own arousal. I started to take him deeper, closing my lips around Duo's hard flesh. I slid my tongue down his length as I went, and my free hand came up to lightly caress his sac. I moved my head back and forth a few times, and I managed to relax my throat enough to take Duo in completely.
He gripped my shoulders and seemed to want to thrust forward, but knew that if he did, he might hurt me.
"Heeeero... oooh. So good... uhnn."
His arousal pulsed again inside my mouth, and the feeling was so erotic that I couldn't hold back a moan of my own. I felt the vibrations of the sound shudder against Duo's length, and he practically screamed in response.
I continued to bob my head back and forth, but in a few seconds I felt Duo's hands gently push me away. I looked up at him, knowing that he'd stopped me because he was too close to climaxing, and we still had other things to enjoy together.
I tried to ignore my aching arousal as I grabbed the bottle of conditioner and used it to brush the tangles from Duo's hair. I went quickly, though I took care to make sure I didn't pull on his hair.
It was obvious that he couldn't stand too much more teasing, but I couldn't help myself. I poured a handful of liquid body soap in my hand and proceeded to wash every inch of his skin. I started at his shoulders, kissing his neck as I rubbed the soap across his back.
"Mmm," he commented, violet eyes glazed in passion.
I massaged his back muscles as I went, and finally reached down to slide my fingers against his tight ass. I ran two slick, soapy fingers down his cleft and brushed against his entrance. Duo purred and leaned forward to give me better access. As much as I liked touching him, I didn't want to bring Duo too close to the edge again, so I soon moved to cover his stomach with soap.
When Duo looked down and saw me approaching his arousal again, he glanced at me pleadingly, so I gave him a few more teasing licks down the side of his length. Immediately I started rubbing the soap down Duo's legs, and I felt him use some of it on my shoulders. I stood and allowed him to continue washing me. Duo stroked my hard length with a soap covered hand, and I moaned loudly, remembering the feel of his mouth on the center of my need.
"There," he said after deciding that I was thoroughly clean. Duo raised his eyes to look at me, and through the sheen of dark hair and the sight of his incredible soaked body, I thought he looked like an angel.
"Duo," I groaned, reaching to turn off the water. "Let's go. Need you..."
He nodded and looked more eager than ever. I stepped out first and got a huge towel to dry my lover with. He dried his hair as much as possible and then toweled me off as well. I shook my head of messy hair and sprayed him with water droplets.
Duo laughed and shielded his face, and I couldn't help wondering at the fact that I was actually being playful. I used the one moment when his eyes were closed to race out into the bedroom. I laid back on the soft sheets of my bed with legs spread and my arousal in hand, waiting for Duo.
He appeared in the doorway a moment later. Duo's mouth was open as though he wanted to say something, but when he saw me lying there and offering myself, he was silent. He grinned with what I could have sworn was evil intent and moved to stand beside my bed. I watched with hungry eyes as his hand stole down to caress his own length.
"Duo. Please," I begged.
He opened his other hand to reveal the tube of lotion and sat down next to my outstretched form. He squeezed a good amount into his hand and leaned down to kiss me as he slid the first slick finger inside. It was a bit painful, but not enough so that I would have asked him to stop. I saw Duo watching my expression of discomfort, and he smiled reassuringly.
"I'm sorry, Heero. It will feel good in a second, I promise."
"I'm ok," I said honestly. I stroked his free hand with my own to show that it was really all right.
Duo added another finger when he thought I was ready. I felt my body relax as the sensation became a bit more familiar, and then pleasurable. I was in the midst of imagining what it would like to have Duo's cock sliding inside me when his fingers brushed a bit deeper inside my passage. They touched a spot that sent white hot pleasure coursing through my body.
"Ahh! Duo!" I cried.
He grinned, and I knew this was the same place which he claimed had felt so good.
"See? Doesn't that feel incredible?"
I nodded and bit my lip as he touched the spot again. My back arched up off the bed, sending my arousal to brush against Duo's. The sensation was too good; I needed more.
"Do it," I gasped. "I'm ready."
Duo looked unsure, so I tried again.
"Please, Duo. Take me. ...I need you."
He smiled and spread the lotion over his erection. I couldn't have taken my eyes away from the sight if I'd wanted to. In every aspect of his body, Duo was perfection.
I spread my legs farther apart and wrapped them around his back as he came closer to me. The tip of his erection pushed against my entrance, and he chose that moment to lean down and kiss me. Duo was a warm presence above me, and I knew then that he was the only person who would be able give me ultimate pleasure. He was the only person I'd ever *want* to share that with.
His cock started to push into me, and I took in a fast breath. I felt sure I was being split in two, but Duo's hardness was stroking the inside of my body, already filling me with an incredible feeling of pleasure.
Duo paused when he was fully sheathed inside me, waiting until I told him I was ready.
"Move, Duo," I gasped after hardly any time had passed. "Please. I want to feel you..."
I pressed my legs against him harder, begging him to start. Duo began to thrust slowly, and he watched my face for any sign of discomfort. I knew there was none, because I was feeling only shocks of pleasure from every place his body touched mine. He moved a bit faster, and one thrust caught that perfect spot inside of me. I threw my head back and shouted in ecstasy as unbelievable feeling drowned me.
Duo hit the spot with every stroke he could manage, and I distantly heard my voice screaming his name. Through slitted eyes I could see him riding the same wave of pleasure which had captured me. My mind left me again when Duo's broken moan furthered my arousal.
"Heero! Ohh, gods, Heero! So good... Love you..."
Duo reached down to grab my neglected cock and stroked it in time with the heated rhythm of our sex.
It was too much at once, and I came even harder than I had last time, covering both Duo and my stomach with my seed. As the sensation coursed on, I felt my muscles clamp down tightly on Duo's cock. He cried in surprise and ecstasy and I felt the liquid heat of his passion. He continued to fill me with his essence, and I wished that the pleasure could go on indefinitely.
As I'd expected, the depth of Duo's emotions was present on his face at the moment when he truly made me his. It was a reflection of every emotion I felt for him, and I knew that I was truly loved.
Duo fell forward onto the bed when it was over, gathering me into the comfort of his arms. We just held each other, and we listened as our heartbeats seemed to find a rhythm that matched. Duo was another part of me now; it didn't occur to me that I should ever have to let go of him, even physically.
"Now I feel complete," he whispered after a long time.. "It wasn't finished until we both had the chance to give ourselves to each other."
I couldn't have agreed more.
The next day, I took care of something extremely important. I arranged to have a live meeting with Dr. J via the video system on my computer. The question of whether he would accept that Duo and I *had* to be together needed to be answered immediately. I knew he would frown upon the risk keeping a live communication open between the two of us, but it had to be done. I asked Duo to stay with me during the meeting time, and he agreed, though I noticed that he looked very worried. I knew he was afraid that Dr. J would refuse our demand. I reassured him more than once that it wouldn't matter if he did. As I had said, I was ready to run far away.
The expression I saw on Dr. J's face when I opened the communication was one of annoyance, exactly as I'd expected.
"Heero, you know this is a big risk; I can't guarantee the security on a channel like this. What is the matter?"
I glanced at Duo and grasped his hand tightly.
"Duo and I are in love," I stated plainly. "We demand that you place us on the same missions from now on. *All* the time."
Dr. J sputtered and looked as though he were about to fall over. For a second he looked like he didn't believe I was really Heero Yuy, that he'd been tricked into a false communication to reveal the place where he and the other scientists were hiding.
"It's me," I growled. I glared at him until he seemed convinced, but the shock never left his face.
"You 'demand?'" He asked incredulously. "What will you do if I say it can't be done?"
I smirked. "Duo and I will disappear."
"It's no joke," I said forcefully. "You have ten seconds to decide."
Dr. J was suddenly more flabbergasted than I'd ever seen him, but I knew what his answer would be. He couldn't lose me as a soldier.
"All right," he agreed stiffly. "I'm not completely heartless."
"Sure," I nodded, and turned instantly to kiss Duo, right in front of the video screen. I heard a muffled sound of surprise from the monitor, and then the clicking sound of Dr. J closing the connection. I smiled into the kiss and held Duo close.
"We already had forever," I told him when we finally broke apart. I ran a hand down his cheek and rested it in the midst of his streaming hair. "No matter what he would have said, we already had that."
Duo grinned at me. He opened his perfect lips to say something, but I couldn't help myself; I closed my eyes and tilted my head slightly forward, waiting.
Duo laughed softly. "Heero..."
Then he closed the distance between us and kissed me softly, inciting a muffled sigh of pleasure from my own mouth.
I realized that I wasn't worried about the days that lay ahead. Even if we continued to pilot the Gundams for a long time to come, I was confident that I could protect Duo. If a problem should ever arise for me, I was just as sure that he would protect me as well. There was a never ending feeling of security in that, and by the way Duo kissed me, I knew there was no reason to feel to anything but anticipation for the future.