When You're Strange
There is nothing in all the world that feels better than a shower when
you're hot and sweaty. Maybe this is something that you've known all
along, but I only discovered it about a year ago, when showers become
normal aspect of life rather than a luxury, and after a hard game of
basketball, I was looking forward to basking in all that steamy glory.
As an added bonus, the shower room was empty by now; most of the guys
had gone in while Heero and I were having our little powwow about the
ship in the harbor, and which one of us was going to get at it first.
His name was Heero.
Believe me, the irony of that does not escape me, and not just because
he's named after that leader guy, either. Although I'm starting to
wonder if he really does know -my- name, or if he just doesn't like it
because he has graciously gifted me with a new one.
Shut up Maxwell.
Yup, that's what he always calls me, at least a couple times a day. Aw,
he gave me a pet name, ain't he sweet?
Anyhow, with the showers empty, except for me and Yuy, I could goggle
at his naked butt all I wanted without anyone else getting nervous. For
some reason, naked guys get a little edgy when other naked guys eyeball
their more private parts. Cowards. Eh, they don't know what they're
missing, I say. Heero has a hell of a nice ass.
Just the mental image of that had me humming as we stripped off and I
was into a full-fledged song by the time the water was running. Just
recently I had taken to singing all the time, mostly because it pissed
off Heero-boy, and there are few things in my life that I have enjoyed
as much as that. He gives me this look that I have affectionately
titled the Glare O' Death. It hadn't worked for him yet, but he hasn't
given up trying. Maybe he hopes it'll build up in my system and I'll
keel over yet.
Years ago, a kind hearted nun had told me that perhaps it would be best
if I just lip-synched the hymns on Sunday. God had a good ear and
surely He'd hear me, she'd said. I'd still gone on my merry way,
belting out the words, and looking back, I feel sorry for every damn
person in that church. Not enough to stop singing though. I'm stone-
tone deaf, but I still love a good song.
Heero just has no taste for the classics.
"People are strange, 'cause when you're a...ouch! Son of a..." I turned
around with a death glare of my own, but Mr. Yuy had already turned
back to his own shower, probably already making a mental note to
himself that if he ever wanted Mr. Maxwell to shut the hell up, all he
had to do was slap him on the ass with the end of a wet towel.
Humph. Hope he enjoyed it because that's damn well as close as he's
getting to my ass for a while.
Oh, did I forget to mention we're sleeping together?
Well, not sleeping, but we're banging like monkeys whenever we get the
chance. I think I've created a monster. Or at least woken up his inner
horny teenager. Yeah, he's playing the game just the way I want him to,
for now. We'll see how well he keeps up.
I turned back the shower, trying to keep my hair from getting wet
because then I'd have to undo it and comb it out, which is a pain in
the ass in good times, much less in a locker room full of other guys.
Now, you do not get to be a guy with hair as long as mine without
taking a little heat for it. I'm pretty used to all the cracks and
girly jokes by now, and I generally kick ass well enough in both gym
and class that I get left alone.
But for the first few weeks I'm stuck with hearing all the old jokes in
a new voice, and trust me, even if you think you've just thought up a
real zinger, don't bother. I've heard them all.
So, this being the way things are with me, I wasn't surprised when
cruising through on the way to my locker, a low wolf whistle started
behind me, and I would have ignored it if it hadn't been cut off with
this weird choking noise. Glancing behind me, I saw this guy sprawled
out on the floor holding his stomach. Huh. Weird.
Another row down, a guy called out to me, "Hey, aren't you in the wrong
A little warily, I turned around again to find another guy sprawled on
the floor. Déjà vu.
Heero was right behind me and I glanced back at him, but soldier boy
just gave me the blandest look in his repertoire and brushed past me to
his own locker. Twenty other gazes followed him warily, and I noticed a
distinct lack of comments about my hair all of a sudden.
I've said it before, I'm not the brightest guy in the world but I
didn't ride the short bus to school either, when I could attend school
anyway. I can put two and two together and get Heero's fist equals two
Way to keep it discreet, pal. And he was bitching at me.
Which is why it is so beyond pathetic how much it thrilled me. Sick,
Maxwell, really sick. Next you'll be asking your boyfriend to carry
your books to class. I shook it off and hurried up to my locker. I
don't know who keeps the locker rooms at arctic temperatures, but right
now my boys were trying to crawl back home and all I wanted in life was
a nice pair of pants.
A shame all my wishes aren't granted so quickly.
I had time to reconsider what I wanted as my wish for the day later
that evening, standing in front of Heero's door while I watched him
type away on his laptop. I tell you, this guy has a real obsession with
computers. I bet he gets a stiffy the second he sits down in his
Only a few hours from now and we were going to be fighting our way
through a group of mobile suits, risking our lives and fighting the
good fight, and he wanted to...type? He'd informed me when I got here
that I was early and kept right on typing. Who knew that when I'd
decided that 11:30 was a good time for getting nookie that he'd chisel
it in a stone tablet? The 11th commandment, thou shalt not have sex
before 11:30. You know, they never mentioned that one anytime I was in
Takes all kinds, I guess. It's a damn shame I just happen to be
screwing one of the mechanically inclined. Or not screwing at this
moment, which was the problem.
Which brought to mind another question that had been bothering me.
"Hey, what was with that girl we saw earlier? Is she following you
around or what?" I asked, crossing my arms and leaning against the
Silence. Gee, big shocker, that. No sex before 11:30 and no
conversation before sex. So Sayeth the Mighty Yuy. S'ok, though, that
wasn't really the question I wanted to ask anyway.
"So, are you banging her?" Now, it wasn't that I really cared if he was
getting dirty with the little princess in her Pepto-Bismol mobile, but
I'd rather know if there is a chance I'm going to be picking up any
cooties from him. It's good to keep track of this shit, you know.
He gave me a blank look and I groaned. Did they grow this guy in a test
tube on Mars or what?"
"You're sleeping with her?" I clarified, adding in a rather crude
gesture that included poking my index finger into my loosely cupped
hand...and found myself slammed backwards against the door, Heero's hands
fisted in the loose material of my shirt as he actually lifted me off
"Don't talk about her like that," he said softly. "Ever."
I nodded hastily, for once words frozen on my tongue. He let me go and
I dropped back to my feet, nearly falling over as I jarred into the
Heero turned back to his computer and I just stood there like the idiot
I was, my shoulder stinging where it had scraped against the door hinge
and feeling...hurt. Which was stupid, fucking stupid, because I'd asked
for that with a hundred percent of my usual tact. Hell, how was I
supposed to know she was...that she...
That she was someone special.
I turned on heel and left without another word. I'd learned years ago
that it was a bad idea to stay where you weren't wanted. It was a good
way to get your ass dead, and never let it be said that Duo Maxwell
doesn't have a healthy survival instinct.
He showed up at my room a little while later, right on schedule. Well,
surprise, surprise. I could have about timed the bastard by the minute.
Wonder if he wrote it that way in his little fucking day planner. 11:00
PM: kill OZ soldiers. 11:30 PM: fuck pilot #2 through the mattress.
If he did, then soldier boy was going to have to get his ass a bottle
of whiteout, because I was about to make a few permanent changes to his
agenda. Nobody fucking well treats me that way, no matter how good they
are at mattress surfing.
I have to give him a little credit; he didn't just waltz into the room
and start stripping off. Nope. Instead, he stood there in the doorway,
hands in his pockets and looking almost awkward, as if -he- was ever
awkward about anything. Unless it has to do with sex and if he asks me
for a blowjob, so help me God...
"I'm sorry," he said quietly.
I didn't say anything, just stayed where I was, sitting on my bed and
reading. Not much to say in my opinion, because I figured if I did
actually say something I might just start to scream at him and that
would be the worst sin I'd ever committed. I was a fucking moron, I
already knew that, for reading between the lines, for making
assumptions about him that I had no right to make, but even I know when
to stop pushing and let things lie. Unfortunately, the spandex kid here
was apparently still reading from a different rulebook.
"Duo..." he sighed, sounding highly put upon. Oh, is the poor baby
suffering? Am I just being a right pain in your prissy little ass?
Should have thought of that before you got on your knees for me, pal,
and suddenly I found my tongue again right quickly. Fuck it. If he was
planning on killing me for what I say or do, then I was damn well going
to earn it.
"I'm trying to study, if you don't mind," I said coldly, wincing before
I'd even finished saying it because -that- was an out and out lie. I'd
been on the same page for about an hour now and like I really needed to
study anyway? We weren't going to be here that much longer.
He frowned at that. Wow, he said my name -and- I earned a facial
expression from him. I feel so important right now, really I do. Maybe
if I am a good boy he'll pat me on the head and give me a fucking dog
I could almost feel him losing his patience when he finally stepped
into the room and I braced myself for Hurricane Yuy, clenching my fists
so hard my nails were biting into my palms. He'd gotten his way with me
more than once now with a little judicious use of force, let's see how
he likes it when I'm not so cooperative. I swear, I'll feed him his own
balls before I...
I was so ready for the beginnings of another war (Like the one we were
already fighting wasn't enough? Gluttons for punishment, the both of
us), that it took me a moment to see that he'd stopped, frozen nearly,
and he was staring at me with the weirdest look on his face.
Pissed off or not, I was starting to think I'd broken him without even
doing anything, until I realized that from the angle he was in he could
see my shoulder in all its Technicolor glory. An ugly scratch from the
door hinge that I'd already dabbed antiseptic on, and it probably
looked a lot worse than it was. I've got that pale skin that bruises so
easily, but there was no way for Heero to know that, and he actually
looked vaguely horrified.
"Duo..." he said again, waking up from his little impromptu trance, and
he reached for me that time. It was pure reflex to flinch back, a
lifetime supply of street instinct forcing me to do an awkward little
crab crawl backwards to avoid his touch. If life had taught me one
thing, it was that if they'd hit you once, they'd do it again. And
again, and again, until you're dead or at least you don't fucking care
whether you are or not. I don't want to play the game badly enough to
die for it.
Now the horror in his expression was very clear, mirrored in those deep
blue eyes of his that had enchanted me so much the first time I'd seen
them. Well, fuck that. I'd been here before and I had no intention of
playing the game this way twice.
I was a little afraid of him and I can admit it without shame. He's
stronger than me and there isn't a damn thing I can do about that. And
if he was planning on using that strength against me then he can damn
well find another fuck toy.
Except...he looked so lost, like a little kid, and he hadn't actually
hurt me himself come to think of it. Sure he'd pushed me into the wall
but not hard enough to actually hurt, it was the hinge that had hurt me
and surely he hadn't meant to...
I was making excuses, stupid fuck that I am, but hadn't I deserved it,
just a little bit? Hell, I know that some things are sacred, could I
hold it against him just because...
Just because I wasn't?
That was my real problem, and I damn well knew it. That she was more
important to him than I was somehow, and who is the real jackass here,
He hadn't hurt me. He'd -insulted- me. How dare he have a thing for
some other person while he was getting cozy between my sheets? How dare
he make me the second-class citizen in his little ménage a trois without
even telling me? Hell, I was the other 'woman' and I didn't even know
As if I had the right to care about that, though. He hadn't exactly
gotten on bended knee for me, and I would have laughed my ass off if he
had. No promise exchanged either way, and what the hell was it with
this guy that I made myself into a grade-A asshole every other day?
He was still standing there, still looking lost and probably feeling
way over his head here, and any second now he was going to turn away
and...and what? Leave me here? Go to his little princess?
Oh, I don't think so.
Now the only problem was digging myself out of this quicksand that I'd
so cheerfully tossed my ass into.
"Heero," I started, trying to think of how the hell I could fix this,
and he blinked, some of the emptiness leaving his eyes. "I...you scared
me this afternoon," I said quietly.
Again with that vaguely horrified look, Jesus, he was breaking my
fucking heart here! "I'm sorry..."
I shook my head hastily, geez, this was the last thing I wanted from
him. "No, wait, let me finish. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have said
what I said about...her. But if I say things you don't like, could you
just...maybe say something next time?" I shrugged, feeling a little
awkward myself and I decided I might as well go for broke while I was
here. "I've just had some...bad stuff...in my past, you know?"
His eyes closed up faster than if they'd had shutters, and I knew I'd
pushed it just a step too far. Rule number one, you don't talk about
the past. He wasn't my confidant or my priest, and I sure as hell
didn't want to be his. I'm nutty enough on my own without adding his
nightmares into my fruit cocktail.
So...the score now is my bad, his bad, my bad...maybe we should stop this
before someone gets dead.
"You're fifteen," he said suddenly, calmly, a fact, and I blinked,
"Yeah, so? You are too."
He nodded slightly, and I was still a little lost kid in Disneyland for
this conversation. Why can't I ever sleep with normal guys?
Heero moved again, slowly this time, to sit next to me on the bed. He
lifted a hand to my cheek, again, slowly, giving me every chance to say
no before he stroked my cheek with the tip of one callused finger, and
who would have known such strong hands could be so very gentle?
I felt like an asshole.
Before I could say anything, Heero leaned forward and kissed me, with
all the tenderness that I sure as hell didn't deserve right now before
he murmured against my lips, "I didn't mean to hurt you."
Now, let me just say that whatever problems Heero had had with clothes
removal in the past are long since over. He is now an expert in the
field of undoing buttons, snaps, zippers, ties and various other
fasteners. Even as careful and gentle as he was being, he still had me
stripped in about .003 seconds, give or take, and God help me, I don't
think anyone has been that gentle with me in my whole life. A
methodical pilot he may be, but when it comes to sex he gives way to
the more abstract and Da Vinci gives way to Dali as his tongue paints
its way over my stomach and lower.
Fuck, I'm so horny I'm all but writing poetry. I almost wish he had
shot me. Almost, and if giving a blowjob were an Olympic sport, Heero
would have three gold medals and a commercial endorsement contract by
now. I've said it before and I'll say it again, this guy is perfect in
everything he does.
All I could do was try not to pull his hair out, as somehow my hands
had gained a side job of holding his head still while I fucked that
hot, soft, oh, god, so hot mouth of his. Trying my damnedest to keep
quiet because generally speaking, the giving and/or receiving of
blowjobs, by and for the student body, was frowned upon by the faculty
of this school.
Speaking of giving and receiving...
Haven't heard of 69 yet, have you, spandex boy? I tell you, this guy
has so many cherries to be plucked he's practically his own orchard.
Shifting carefully so I didn't accidentally get my most sensitive parts
bitten off, I managed to maneuver the both of us so we were face to
crotch. I didn't bother stripping off his pants, just unfastened them
enough to slip a hand inside and rescue his poor, trapped erection.
He made a soft, startled noise and I groaned as it vibrated around my
cock. Pulling myself together as much as I could, I wrapped my lips
around the tip of his erection and sucked. He tasted salty, slick
against my tongue, and all the better for the fact that I suddenly knew
that I was the only one who'd ever done this to him. I'd taught him how
to suck, to fuck, to touch and taste, and God, this guy has a mouth on
him that is softer, hotter than my best wet dream.
A few minutes later, it turned out to be a damn good thing the both of
us had our mouths full because the scream I muffled would have woken up
half the staff, and confirmed the suspicions of our classmates about
the two new guys. He swallowed obligingly, and I moaned again,
helplessly, before redoubling my own efforts on him.
Who says those that teach can't do?
Afterward, sweat-dampened skin clinging and our heartbeats slowly
dropping from out of the stratosphere, he played with my hair,
unraveling it from the braid and spreading it all over without my
permission. Again. Now, if Relena Pizzacrust was sacred to him, then my
hair was sacred to me, but -some- of us don't mind sharing our toys.
Plus, it's pretty hard to complain when you are nearly purring. His
hands were almost as good as his mouth, sliding over my scalp and
combing through my hair. I was nearly asleep when he finally stopped
and curled up next to me. We still had a few more hours before we went
after that ship, and I took my turn at the post-coital snugglies,
massaging his back and shoulders with my free hand.
One of his hands accidentally brushed over my shoulder, and I hissed
softly, trying not to let him know. The crisis had been averted and I
sure as hell didn't want to start up the war when we were in the middle
of a cease-fire. No, I was wrong. This was two problems solved because
it was -my- bed he'd come to in the middle of the night. Mine. Damn
good thing, too, because as long as he is bumping uglies with me, there
will be no banging of the princess. One fuckbuddy at a time, pal. Thems
the rules of the game.
And I'm not done playing, yet.