disclaimer: the boys aren't mine. i just play with them for my own entertainment. if they didn't like it, they'd complain... right?
this is a sequel to 'mercury rising' (it is highly suggested that you read 'mercury rising' before you read this)
pairings: 2X1, 1XOC, 1X2
overall rating: NC-17
cumulative warnings: yaoi, AU, pov, possibility of kinky things, citrusiness; some implied, some shown and a shit load of angst
spoilers: *coughs* ermmm... no
notes: this is for kelly; who is adamant in her belief that my mercury duo is in need of a major attitude adjustment..... and that heero has just the tool for the job. *hentai grin* she didn't ask for the angst... that just comes with the territory ^_^;;
another note: many thanks to frog for the beta and her encouragment on this part too... you rock, frog! *huggles*
summary: heero wants something from duo that he isn't likely to give him without some sort of confrontation....
// heero's thoughts //
a change in the weather
I ended up falling asleep on the couch at around 9 and didn't wake again until just before noon. I headed into the bathroom for a quick shower and then made my way into the bedroom to get dressed. Duo was still sound asleep, though he had sprawled out to cover most of the large bed and had thrown the blanket off sometime during the night.
Entering the kitchen, I poured myself a left over cup of coffee, set it into the microwave and sat down to have breakfast. I tried not to think too much about the upcoming discussion between Duo and I, but found it unavoidable. I reconfirmed then, the decision I had made last night to bring everything that was bothering me out into the open. My heart rate quickened at the sound of Duo moaning from the other room and I reigned in my thoughts. I stood to start another pot of coffee while waiting for him to come into the kitchen. It was several more minutes before he did, and he looked as miserable as I'm sure he must have felt.
"Good afternoon." I offered with a smile. I spoke softly and watched as he slowly lowered himself down onto the chair directly across the table from me. "Something to eat?"
He shook his head no and looked as if the very idea disgusted him. "Aspirin and some coffee?" he asked quietly. I nodded and crossed the kitchen to fulfill his request, setting the two blue pills down on the table in front of him, along with a small glass of water and cup of coffee; light and sweet, just the way he likes it.
I pretty much ignored his presence for the moment and started clearing the table of the few dishes I had used for breakfast. I turned from the sink to find his elbows propped up on the table and his head resting in his hands. "Why don't you go take a shower?" I suggested. He nodded once, and pushed the chair back from the table to stand. "Is it okay if I borrow something to wear?"
"Sure." I told him. "Go ahead." We aren't exactly the same build, but size medium t-shirts and sweatpants seem to work for both of us.
I was seated in the living room when he came out of the shower about 20 minutes later. His hair was wet and loose and he had a large bath towel wrapped around most of it. He looked a great deal more relaxed and smiled at me as he sat on the opposite side of the couch. "I guess I owe you an explanation or an apology, or something." He began
"That's not necessary." I told him in all honestly.
"I meant to call you during the week..."
He didn't though and I wondered if he planned on telling me why. After a minute of silence, I decided that he apparently wasn't going to. He sat back on the couch and eventually looked over at me.
"I was pretty drunk last night."
I nodded. "Yes. You were." I couldn't help but speculate about just how much of last night he recalled. "Jay said you were rather insistent that they bring you here."
"I remember that much." He told me. "The rest is a little... hazy." He winked at me then and I smiled back at him. "I do remember you putting me to bed. Thanks."
"You needed the help." I chuckled as I thought about last night.
"You didn't sleep with me though."
I shook my head no.
"You were drunk."
He sighed. "I think we've already determined that, Heero. I offered to let you fuck me. You turned me down."
Well, that was rather... . blunt. "Like I said, you were drunk."
"And that explains everything?"
"It doesn't." He sighed. "Shit, Heero, I'm having a really hard time figuring you out here."
"You're having a hard time figuring *me* out?" I retorted. " Just what is it about me that you do not understand, Duo?"
"You want to fuck me, yes?"
"Yes." I was quick to agree, "But I would rather... ."
He was quick to cut me off. "That's not going to happen, Heero. You should have taken me up on the offer while you could."
I promptly decided that this was the perfect opportunity for me to ask Duo why he was so insistent about being top. "Just what is it about being bottom that makes you so dead set against it, anyway."
He smiled and for some reason, it made me uneasy. "I don't need a reason, Heero."
Technically, he was correct. "But you have one." I replied. He had to.
He shifted on the couch, obviously uncomfortable with my assertion. I knew I was not going to get an answer from him without pushing. So I pushed. "Do you think that it somehow makes you more gay?"
"I said, do you think that... "
"I heard what you said the first time, Heero." he spat back at me.
"I'd rather not talk about this."
"You never want to talk about it."
He remained silent.
"A relationship is about give and take." I had practiced that line a lot over the past several days. I did consider what we had a relationship, albeit a peculiar one.
"I'm giving it to you. You're giving it to Vince, I really don't see what the problem is."
I was definitely able to detect a twinge of jealousy in that remark. This conversation was about him and I and had absolutely nothing to do with Vince, or anyone else for that matter. I seriously doubted that I was the only one Duo was sleeping with. "Fine." I told him as I stood, "Just forget it."
I left the room and went back into the kitchen. I didn't have anything to do in there; I just wanted to get away from Duo. He followed me into the room several minutes later.
"What is it exactly that you want from me, Heero?"
"I don't want anything, Duo."
"Bullshit. You want me to tell you that I'm gay? Fine. I'm gay. Happy?"
"Yes. Very." I monotoned. "Pack up your stuff. I have to take you home now."
He left the kitchen without another word and headed for the bedroom. I waited only a minute or two before joining him. He was seated on the edge of the bed and in the process of folding his clothes. I stood in the doorway with my arms folded across my chest and watched him.
"This isn't just about the sex." I finally blurted out.
"No. You have issues."
"I do, huh? And just when the hell did you become my shrink, Heero?"
I should have seen that one coming. I ignored the remark, opting instead to tell him just what I thought his issues were. "Everything is about control with you." I told him. "It's why you won't bottom and how you manage to keep me and all the rest of your lovers at a safe distance." That was pretty much the gist of things as far as I could tell.
"Don't you dare presume to know that much about me, Heero!" He shouted back, looking very much appalled.
I was tempted to tell him to lower his voice, but decided it would probably be a bad idea. I couldn't help but thinking that his reaction to my statement only confirmed it. "I could be wrong." I admitted.
"Oh. Admitting we're not infallible, are we?"
I snorted. "At least one of us is willing to admit it."
We were getting off track. I wanted to say more; I wanted to admit to Duo that he meant a great deal more to me than I thought I did to him and how confused I was by the mixed signals he was sending me, and to clue him in on just how much all of that frustrated me. I got the distinct impression that none of that mattered now. I did feel better getting off my chest what I had managed to say.
I followed his movement across the room and watched as he stepped into the bathroom. He stood in front of the sink and removed the towel from his hair and folded it before reaching up onto the shelf above the sink for the brush and began running it through his hair. "I think I'd prefer it if you just called me a cab."
I stood in the doorway, just watching him.
"I was right about you, yanno." He uttered a minute later. "You really are a piece of work."
"And you're not?" I asked bitterly.
Duo slammed the wooden hairbrush down onto the glass shelf in anger, shattering it into dozens of jagged pieces. "Fuck!" He shouted, clutching at his right hand as he did.
I started toward him, growing more concerned as I approached and saw the wide trail of blood dripping down his arm. I gasped as I saw the rather large fragment of thick green tinted glass he was currently extracting from the palm of his hand. "I'm fine." He growled in my direction. "Just go call the fucking cab, will you!"
I thought better of arguing with him, though I recognized that he was not fine at all and went into the kitchen to call the local car service. When I returned to the bathroom, he had cleaned up most of the glass and had wrapped his hand with several yards of toilet paper. "I do have gauze." I told him.
"I already told you I was fine." He said and then turned toward me. "I cleaned up most of the mess." He told me somewhat apologetically.
"Don't worry about it." I responded. I was more concerned about his hand. The thick layer of paper that covered his palm was already soaked through with blood.
"I'll be taking a rain check on the rest of the idle chatter." He told me as he brushed past me on his way out of the bathroom.
I am not a violent person, but the desire I had to strike Duo at that moment was not easily squelched. I moved to follow behind him and remained standing in the doorway of the bedroom to watch as he put his clothes into a paper bag.
"I have nothing else to say." I let him know, keeping my tone curt and devoid of emotion.
"Good. That makes two of us."
He reached for the doorknob on the front door to my apartment. "I'll send your stuff back in the mail. Send me a bill for the shelf." He told me as stepped out into the hallway and slammed the door closed behind him.
I sighed. "That didn't go very well." I admitted to myself. I wasn't really all that surprised, except for the realization that despite all my doubts, I had been reading Duo right all along.
The door reopened just a second later and Duo looked directly at me as he spoke. "And just for the record, Heero, I haven't slept with *anyone* else since we met."
I flinched as the door slammed shut again.
No. Not very well at all.