Disclaimer: Don't own anything Gundam Wing, only wish I did (sigh!)

Rating (overall): NC-17
Pairing (main): 1x2
Warnings (general): lemon, language, violence, non-con sex, Duo torture, angst, OOC, AU, yaoi, Het, S/M, Squick, POV

A/N: This disturbing tale was inspired by several Anne Rice novels (O goddess of the strange and fascinating!) and my own twisted little mind. Note that, unlike in Beauty’s court, poor Duo is all alone in his ordeal. That makes it much more interesting, I think.

For You I Suffer
Part 15
by Heartfelt

No sooner were we out of the confines of Furuiki than I voiced my concerns to my trainer.

"My lord, I am to serve as a field hand for the gamekeeper?" My tone was satisfactorily even, giving no hint of my distress.

"Yes, Duo. When ever the baron can spare you, of course."

We ran for a time before I was able to ask my next question. "So, what will be the extent of my duties?" I couldn't bring myself to be any more blunt.

"Well," Quatre said hesitantly, "I suppose you'll do what you did when you were on your own farm. I confess," he chuckled, "I am not all that well versed in matters of agriculture and husbandry."

I laughed weakly so as to appear appreciative of his candor. But my anxieties still plagued me and I pressed him for a more relevant response.

"Um, truthfully, what I really want to know, my lord, is..." I swallowed down my nervousness, taking solace in the steady rhythm my booted feet made against the packed dirt of the road. "Is farming all that will be expected of me?"

Again, my question was obtuse, but, this time, Quatre seemed to understand.

"Ah," he said, his soft laughter barely reaching my ears over the wind. "You mean is Trowa allowed to be familiar with you?"

I nodded, hoping he would see as my voice was rendered temporarily mute from embarrassment.

"Trowa is one of the baron's subjects and, as such, you are to offer him ever courtesy and complete obedience."

I almost tripped in my astonishment. What was he saying? Did that mean that I was free...or, rather, compelled...to put myself at the gamekeeper's mercy?

"However," Quatre continued, "that does not mean that Trowa will be allowed to be overly familiar with you, Duo. For example, although I found it amusing that the farmer in the square was bold enough to touch you so intimately, I would have been most displeased if I'd found him taking you. That privilege is reserved solely for the baron, unless, of course, he states otherwise.

"No, Duo," he added, "Trowa would not dare defy the baron in such an infamous manner. They are well known to each other. Friends, you might say. The baron is dreadfully fond of hunting and Trowa supplies him with the best game in all of Calderash. There will be no disrespect from that quarter."

I was so relieved that I raced back toward the castle with wings on my heels. Even passing through the village and seeing the locus of my earlier ignominy brought me no pain. My heart was safe and my paltry self-control would not have to be tested. I could remain faithful to my baron in body and I would learn to curb the mutinous yearnings of my heart.

Even now, I had already begun to forget my strange attraction to the gamesman. What was he, after all, to my baron? What comparison could be made between the ruler of a kingdom and the man who kept his lands? None, of course. Trowa was nothing to me. I would do my duty and offer him my agricultural talents with nary a care or hesitation. The towers of Windshire filled my heart with a blissful sense of homecoming and I was unable to stop the smile that spread across my lips.

We reached the courtyard and I was summarily relieved of my fetters and footwear. My worldly adventure had come to an end, and none too soon in my estimation. I breathed in the cool air of the castle's interior, reveling in the smells that announced the impending feast in honor of the visiting dignitaries.

Quatre asked a passing servant as to the baron's whereabouts. His lordship was in his study with Lord Zechs, he was informed. We traveled to the indicated chamber with all haste, though it still seemed slow to my deprived senses. After such a trying day, I wanted nothing more than to bask in the intoxicating presence of the man I loved. We reached the doors of the study and they were opened at a word from my trainer.

I stepped eagerly through the door, falling without thought to my knees, completely unaware of the biting hardness of the stones. For, at last, there he was. Deep-blue eyes turned towards me and I was immediately lost within them. My baron rose from his seat, Lord Zechs forced to halt in the middle of a sentence. He came to stand before me and my entire being reached out towards him. He stood silently for a moment, his gaze piercing me with accustomed intensity. And then, a gentle finger was caressing the side of my face.

I closed my eyes and dropped to his feet. My lips fastened worshipfully on the leather of his boots. There was, alas, no question who ruled my heart, my very soul. I had returned, finally, to Heero and never again would I doubt my devotion.


Dinner was a muted affair. Though I was beyond happiness to be back at my baron's side, ensconced comfortably on my velvet pillow, Heero was not nearly so sanguine. Apparently, the trade talks had not gone as smoothly as he and Lord Zechs had wished.

After returning, I'd remained in the study while they continued their meeting. Quatre had offered to take me back to the baron's chambers but, apparently, Heero could not bear to be parted from me for a moment longer. Or, at least, that is the fantasy with which I contented myself. My trainer's offer was politely refused and I was allowed to remain in my usual spot next to the desk. Wing was, of course, in his usual place, as well, on the other side of the baron's chair.

So it was during this time that I learned about what had transpired during the meeting with the trade delegates. The Slaburry ambassadors, though polite, had been more than eager to put the young baron through his paces before signing any agreements. Every minute element of the treaty was debated and modified before being consented to. Thus, they had failed to completely review all of the treaty's terms during the day's session.

One representative in particular, Treize Kushrenada, an emissary from Oz, a major principality within Slaburry, had been most vociferous. Now, at dinner, I could see the tall, handsome, ginger-haired ambassador talking to Lord Zechs in an urbane tone that grated over my nerves. He was comparing the fruit crop of Oz with that of Calderash, saying that there was no reason for Slaburry to import such an inferior product given that it already had the most delicious fruit in the known world available to it.

"It is futile, my dear Zechs, to attempt to bargain from such a position of weakness. The baron will have to come up with a much more attractive incentive if he wishes Slaburry to sign his little treaty. After all," the emissary continued, taking a bite of a succulent shrimp, "it is not we who need the cooperation of Calderash to insure our survival. We were not so careless with our resources and have not suffered unduly from this drought."

I glanced up at Heero and could see the tension in his firm jaw. I felt a rush of antagonism for the arrogant delegate on his behalf. I took a moment to think of all the things I would do later in the privacy of the baron's chamber to easy his mind.

I had, of course, been presented to the trade delegates, although, thankfully, not with the thoroughness of my introduction to the Calderash gentry. I had felt several pairs of eyes linger over my bared flesh during the course of the evening. But, none studied me with such unabashed curiosity as did Ambassador Kushrenada. The royalty of Slaburry had never done anything as decadent as keep a pleasure slave and I was a most interesting novelty.

I prayed fervently for dinner to end. I wanted Heero to myself, needing to offer him comfort and to rid myself of any lasting remembrances of a certain pair of emerald-green eyes. Just as the final drinks were being poured, Quatre took me from the hall and led me to Heero's chamber so I could receive my nightly absolutions from Helen.


My hair shinning and my skin pink from a thorough scrubbing, Helen released me into Quatre's care later that evening and made her 'goodnights.' My old dildo had been removed as before and my face was still flushed from the effort. Heero had yet to return so my trainer and I waited in the sitting room, with impatience on my part. Ever since returning to the castle that afternoon, I had tried to think of some way in which I could proved the extent of my love for my handsome master. I had racked my brain during my rest in the baron's study and had continued throughout dinner, but it wasn't until receiving my most intimate cleansing from Helen that inspiration struck.

"My lord," I said tentatively, glancing up at Quatre shyly from my position at his feet. "Might I ask a favor?"

He looked down at me, an indulgent smile on his lips. "And what would you ask, pretty one?" He reached down and ran several strands of my hair over his fingers.

Calmed as always by his touch, I pressed forward. "I-I was wondering if... if you wouldn't mind not fitting me with my new dildo tonight."

Quatre paused, the corner of his lips losing their upward curve. Several lines began to mar his clear brow, expressing his confusion.

"But, Duo, you know I can not fulfill that request. You must be fitted..."

"I know," I dared to interrupt. Words tumbled from my lips as I rushed to explain. "It's not that I don't wish to be fitted, it's just that I don't want you to do it."

The wrinkles of disconcertion deepened as my handler's expression became a definite frown. "Why not? Who else will fit you if I don't? Unless," he continued, his look of displeasure lifting in an instant, "you want Heero to do it. Is that it?"

"Um, n-no," I stuttered, the flush in my cheeks due as much to intrigue at Quatre's suggestion as to nervousness. "No, I don't want him to fit me, either."

My trainer's frown returned with force. "Then whom?" he questioned, his voice escalating in pitch.

I could hardly believe my own cheek. Embarrassed didn't even begin to describe my state-of-mind and I found myself unable to speak my request aloud. Kneeling up so that my lips were on a level with his ear, I whispered the desires of my heart to my loyal friend, hoping against hope that he would not think me foolish.

Quatre's eyes widened comically as I spoke, the aquamarine irises nearly swallowed whole by the black of his dilated pupils. For a single, horrid moment, I feared that I had gone too far, that my impulsive desire to please had offended rather than securing the approbation which I sought. I sank down onto my haunches, lowering my eyes towards the thick, gray carpet as I awaited my punishment with heavy resignation.

Instead of offering rebuke, however, Quatre placed his hands on the sides of my face and lifted my head until he could meet my wary gaze. He blinked rapidly, his mouth working soundlessly as he tried to find his voice.

"But, Duo, why would you offer this? It's unprecedented!"

I swallowed. 'Why?' Why, indeed. Because, I had seen the stress and tension in my master's shoulders as he was tormented by the accursed Slaburry representatives. Because, I felt the urge to sooth him in some way. Because, I wanted to give my baron something from my heart, something precious that would express the intensity of my feelings.

"Because, I love him," I whispered.

Quatre's bright eyes misted at my declaration, a hand placed dramatically over his soft heart. His cheeks dimpled as he bestowed upon me one of his patented, blinding smiles. He leaned towards me until his face was inches from my own.

"Alright then," he murmured and pressed his lips softly against mine.

At that moment, the chamber door opened and the baron stepped into the room. I jerked back in guilty surprise, though I had done nothing wrong. Certainly I had not initiated that inappropriate kiss. Huh, inappropriate. When would I learn that that word no longer held any significance for me?

Heero paused in the doorway for a long moment, a single eyebrow lifted in question as he took note of our close proximity. Certainly, Quatre was my trainer and no one had more control over my person except for my master, himself. But, had the blond been overly familiar with his charge?

Apparently not. The baron abandoned his pose by the door and closed it with nary a comment. Quatre rose from the couch and followed Heero into the bed chamber, his casual chatter betraying no concern. With a repressed sigh, I followed the confusing pair, some miniscule smidgeon of lingering pride asking why, just once, my baron couldn't express some jealously over me.

"So, the delegates finally decided to release you?" Quatre asked, glancing back towards me with an air of repressed excitement. "Were they any more cordial over drinks?"

Heero paused at the foot of his bed and I rushed forward to assist him in removing his garments. "No," he said succinctly as I tackled the ties of his shirt with my teeth. He ran a gentle hand over my hair as I knelt before him.

Accustomed to the baron's frugality of speech, Quatre continued the conversation. "Well, perhaps tomorrow will bring you success." My eyes nervously followed my trainer's movements as he brought forth yet another wooden box. By now, I was well aware of what mysteries it held and I struggled to hold firm to my resolve. I carefully unlaced the fastenings on the baron's breeches, ignoring the aching flesh between my legs that pulsed in excitement at my proximity to my master's endowments.

Heero replied with an unoptimistic "hn" as he stepped free of his leggings. Raising to my feet for the first time since entering the bedchamber, I took up his discarded clothing and moved quickly to the wardrobe and relinquished my burden. I fell, once more, to my knees and crawled towards the bed, throwing a surreptitious glance towards my handler. He met my gaze with a collaborative smile before returning his attention to my baron.

"It's time for Duo's final fitting, my lord," he said unnecessarily.

Heero grunted tiredly and sat upon the bed, his back resting against the headboard. "Let's get on with it, then." I might have been offended by his apparent disinterest if I hadn't seen the dark circles beneath his eyes. I realized that his lack of concern stemmed solely from his exhaustion and was consoled.

My resolve strengthened as to my course of action, that is, it did until Quatre removed the latest and final dildo from the box. I could feel my eyes growing large with shock as I beheld the wooden monstrosity that would soon take up residence within my body. Objectively, I realized that the implement was, in fact, smaller than my baron's impressive member. But the unyielding nature of the smooth oak drove all rationalities from my mind.

As exquisitely detailed as all the others, the thing was huge, easily as big around as a sturdy jousting staff. Neither was it's length a trivial matter. I suspected that it would easily take up most of the distance between my wrist and the bend of my elbow, had I cared to make the measurement. The slick surface seemed to gleam with an evil light and my breath caught in my throat.

Quatre noticed my dazed expression and his brows lifted in silent inquiry. It was time, time to fulfill my rash request. But, could I do it? Was I really so eager to take this task upon myself? My attention, which had been fastened unwaveringly on the dildo, drifted towards the man reclining on the bed. Did my enamorment with the baron truly reach such depths?

Heero sighed, his eyes closing as his head tilted back against the headrest. His weariness spoke to my heart and my hesitation dissolved in a wave of tenderness. If my master could run an entire kingdom plighted by a severe drought, and overcome his pride enough to negotiate with the arrogant delegates of his father's enemy, then I could most certainly do this trivial thing.

I kept my eyes on Heero's beloved visage as I lifted myself onto the bed and crawled slowly towards him. The surface of the mattress shifted at my movements and the baron' eyes opened. Noting my nearness, he gazed at me with weary curiosity. I held his gaze, my pulse racing with predictable speed at his propinquity. I heard Quatre's boots shuffle through the plush carpet as he approached us. He stopped at the side of the bed but the baron did not turn away from me.

"My lord, Duo has a gift for you."

My fascinated gaze traced voraciously over my baron's fine features. I prayed my offering would be acceptable.

"At your pleasure, he has asked that I not fit him with his dildo. Rather..." Quatre paused with theatrical intent. Anticipation clenched in my stomach.

"Rather, he would like to do the honors himself."

on to part 16

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