For You I Suffer
The first sensation I noticed upon entering the baron's private chamber was the lushness of the carpeting against the soles of my feet. Looking down, I noticed that the entire floor was covered with a thick, smoky gray carpet. The fibers were of a softness I'd never felt before and my toes wriggled appreciatively in the plush pile.
Quatre was quick to see my interest. "The carpet is made of wool mixed in with real silk. Nice, isn't it?"
I met his gaze and nodded in agreement before turning my attention to the rest of the room. The walls were of a dark burgundy, warmed by the light of the fire. Several tasteful tapestries hung in strategic places. A dark couch, covered comfortably in short, dense fur, sat before the fire. Two doors led off of the sitting room, one to the right and the other to the left. The room was soothing and warm and did nothing to alleviate my anxiety.
The blond trainer eyed me thoughtfully. A sheen of sweat covered my skin, caused by tension and high emotions. He rubbed a finger down my chest, taking care to bypass my sensitive nipple. He removed the finger and looked at it as he rubbed it against his thumb.
"Hmm, I think a bath is in order. Come with me."
Releasing the chain and leaving me to follow freely in his wake, he walked towards the leftmost doorway. I reached the opening and peered inside, seeing a finely appointed bathroom, replete with a large, marble tub supported on four claw-shaped stands at one side of the room. The floor was titled and a beaten sheet of metal hung on one wall. I glanced away from the mirror, reluctant to view my image and the totality of my transformation. It was easier to see myself through the eyes of others than with my own.
Quatre stepped over to a long bell-pull and tugged on the rope. "I've summoned servants to bring water," he explained. "Someone will also come to help you bathe. Won't that be nice?"
I wasn't sure what to make of his bubbly tone. I'd never needed help bathing in the past and I didn't know why he thought I required assistance. The handler settled himself on the edge of the tub and looked at me with his typical friendliness.
"While we wait, Duo, I want to explain something to you. You heard Heero speak of the rule?"
I nodded, relieved that at least one of my burning questions was soon to be answered.
"Well, really it's rather simple. No one is to touch you without Heero's express consent ..."
I found that pronouncement very comforting.
"... and he may give you to whomever he wishes."
That I did not like.
"What do you mean 'to whomever he wishes'?" I cringed at the pleading tone in my voice but after the events of the dining hall, the thought of anyone's touch except Heero's frankly terrified me.
Quatre's eyes were compassionate but his tone was firm. "Duo, you are Heero's slave. He can do with you whatever he wants. You are his greatest treasure and from time to time, he may desire to share you with those he deems worthy. Do you understand?"
I looked at him, knowing he spoke the truth, but not wanting to accept it. And yet, hadn't I already witnessed this philosophy at work? The baron had allowed the Calderash nobles to touch me because he wanted them to be able to appreciate me up close, as it were. Clearly, it was not to be an isolated event. I would have to learn to exert better control over my body else my purely physical reactions to human contact would continue to cause me humiliation.
"Yes, I understand."
Quatre nodded, politely ignoring the waiver in my voice. A knock sounded on the door and we both turned towards the sound.
"Ah, the water has arrived. Come in!"
The door opened at his summons and two strapping young men entered, each bearing a large, steaming tub. I was again made aware of my nakedness, envious of even the servants' homespun garments. However, their attention was fixed upon the tubs as they endeavored not to slosh the water on the tiles, and they blessedly ignored me.
The person who entered the bathroom behind them, carrying only a small box, was not so solicitous. The matronly woman reminded me of my own mother, a fact that disturbed me to no end. She was plump, with capable-looking hands earned from a lifetime of domestic work. She nodded towards Quatre, placed the box on the floor, and then turned her full attention onto me. She raked my entire figure with her sharp, brown gaze and never had my new status cause me more pain.
I couldn't bear to know what this woman thought of me. There I stood, a collar around my throat, my nipples caught in golden clamps, and a snug ring making my cock stand straight out from my body. I lowered my eyes, unable to meet her steady regard. It was through hearing alone that I knew when the tubs were filled and that the male servants directly vacated the room. I saw first Quatre's stylish boots then the woman's sensible shoes stop before my own bare feet. A finger reached under my bowed chin and my head was lifted.
The finger belong to the woman and she examined me closely. She ran a hand over my cheek then down my chest. Her touch was clinical and, thankfully, caused me no embarrassment. Finished with her exploration of my person, she raised her gaze to my hair.
While she eyed my braid, Quatre made the introductions. "Duo, this is Helen. She's here to see to your personal needs and to prepare you for the baron."
My head snapped up at the woman's name. Helen! (1) It was impossible! First she reminded me of my mother and now she had my mother's name? It was insane! I suddenly couldn't bear to be in her presence, let alone allow her to do whatever it was she needed to do to ready me for Heero. I paled and backed away from her, causing her to narrow her eyes with curiosity. Quatre, if he noticed, refrained from commenting on my behavior.
"Now, I'm going to leave you to Helen. I have a few things to prepare in the other room." Quatre turned to leave and I had the sudden urge to beg him to stay. I didn't want to be left alone with this woman. Apparently, she was to bathe me and if my body reacted inappropriately to her touch... I couldn't even complete the incestuous thought. But, with difficulty, I held my peace and my trainer left the room. Swallowing my discomfiture, I faced Helen.
She looked at me for a moment, her sharp gaze studying the blush in my cheeks. "Remind you of someone, do I?" Her voice was hearty and had nothing of my mother's dulcet tones. At least that was something I could be grateful for.
"My mother," I mumbled in answer to her question.
"Hmm," she replied, raising an intrigued eyebrow. She looked at me for a moment longer then chuckled, struck by, what was to her, the humor of the situation. I, unfortunately, couldn't share in her amusement.
"Well, that ought to make this interesting, to say the least." Seeing that I was still blushing rather than smiling, she added, "Just think back to when your mother bathed you as an infant. This won't be any different. Well, not much anyway."
Though appreciative of her efforts to ease my nervousness, her words were not very helpful.
"So, first let's do something with that hair and then, into the tub, young man!"
Before I could speak, she took hold of my arm and sat me on the edge of tub. She took off my collar and then, moving so quickly that I could barely follow, she reached down and matter-of-factly removed the clamps from my nipples.
"They'd just slip off once I soaped you up. I'll replace them when I'm done."
She'd hardly finished speaking when fire blossomed in my liberated flesh. I opened my mouth, helpless to repress the cry that rose from my throat. As I keened, awash in the pain of blood suddenly pumping through my freed nipples, I leaned forward, pressing my face into Helen's ample hip, instinctively seeking comfort.
She placed a hand on my head, stroking my hair soothingly. "Poor thing. You've never been clamped before, hmm?" Fortunately, she didn't expect an answer because I could offer none. Slowly the pain faded and I raised my head, tearstains decorating my flushed cheeks.
"There now. Better already. Now, for that hair." With efficient movements, she loosed my braid and fluffed my hair, allowing it to cascade down my back, the ends trailing into the heated water behind me. After her comforting actions of a moment ago, I hardly minded the fact that my final, remaining barrier had just been breached. I'd known my hair would be violated at some point but having this woman who so reminded me of my mother gently run a brush through my hair did much for my immediate sanity.
Helen applied the brush with practiced thoroughness, ridding me of even the hint of a tangle. She then prompted me into the water with an "into the tub with you" and took up a soft sponge. While telling me about every one of her seven grandchildren, she washed the nervous sweat from my skin and lathered my hair with a pleasant-smelling shampoo. She then rinsed out the lather and again used the brush to smooth down the clean, slick strands.
Her gentle ministrations had greatly relaxed my body and soothed my nerves and I regarded her movements with sleepy contentment. Reaching into the box, she removed a strange object. It was a hollow tube, grooved along the sides and rounded on one end with a small hole. The other end was connected to a bag. The bag was empty until she placed the entire contraption into the water, filling the bag and tube through the small hole.
My tranquility began to fade at the sight of the assemblage and I watched her closely, not daring to ask her to explain its purpose. I was certain to find out soon, whether I wanted to or not. Sure enough, once the bag was full she looked at up me.
"Up on your knees now."
Her voice was soft, as though she was almost apologetic for whatever she was about to do. I did not try to argue or beg for mercy. Never releasing her gaze, I did as she asked. A soft smile graced her lips and she patted me on the shoulder with her free hand.
Thinking back, I should have known what was about to occur. But at the time, I didn't realized her intent until I felt the tube pressing against the hidden entrance of my ass. Stunned, I jerked away, every muscle tightening against the threatened invasion.
"It'll be alright, Duo," she soothed, she strong hand restraining me by her hold on my shoulder. "Just relax." When my stretched eyes stayed wide and my body tense, she sighed but kept the tube pressed against me. "Duo, I have to do this. Experiencing this now will make things easier for you later. Trust me, son. You'll be alright."
While she was explaining, questions rushed through my mind. 'Make things easier?' What things, I wondered. How could having this tube shoved up my ass possibly be beneficial? Just what was she preparing me for?
Actually, I had an inkling of what she meant, not being a total innocent. My few times with Hilde provided a basis for my supposition and the baron's handsome face suddenly flashed before my eyes making my cock twitch knowingly. But not even thoughts of Heero quieted my unease.
In the end, it was the 'son' that got through to me. Did I trust this woman? I had no reason to. She was a relative stranger to me, though she'd spent the last half hour learning me more intimately than anyone else ever had save for my true mother. The only thing she had to encourage my cooperation was her name and her resemblance to my sainted parent. But it was enough. It had been a day - yes, only a day - of intense shocks and a bit of home was just what I need to find my balance.
I looked into her kindly brown eyes and decided to trust. "Will you always be the one to care for me like this?" I asked like a child, afraid to be left alone in the darkness.
"Yes," she promised.
I stared at her for a moment more and forced the tension out of my body. As I calmed, she pushed the tube inside my ass. She really didn't push it very far; the tube was placed no further than Relena's finger had been earlier that evening. For a moment, I was grateful to the girl for her presumption. Having been given some point of reference made the experience less disturbing; yet even so, the muscled ring surrounding my opening clenched, struggling to eject the foreign object.
"Relax," she said and I did try. The tube was much larger than Relena's finger and the discomfort was not insignificant. She had me lower myself into the tub, allowing the water to both relax my muscles and provide much needed lubrication.
Eventually, her persistence and patience was rewarded and the tube was inserted to her satisfaction. I sighed in relief, not wanting to repeat the experience anytime soon but knowing I would whether I liked it or not. Gently, she squeezed the bag and my bowels were filled with warm, cleansing water. The sensation, though strange, was not unpleasant. It was as though my insides were being softly caressed and it prompted my eyes to flutter and a soft moan to pass my lips. The water flowed out past the grooves in the tube, allowing the soiled water to leave me as clean water was applied. Finally the water flowed clear and Helen removed the tube.
My body had accommodated to its presence and I hardly felt its retraction. For the first time, I felt hopeful that no challenge I might face during my time here would be impossible to meet. Accepting this foreign object into my body had certainly been the most difficult thing physically I'd yet faced and I'd managed to survive rather well. I turned to Helen, and she met my shy smile with a fond one of her own.
"That's a good boy. I'll tell you something, Duo, I was the one who cared for the famed Pennela during her tenure. Certainly she faced trials and torments, but there were some things she never had to suffer. One of them, you just experienced. Being a pleasure slave is much more difficult for a man; certain things that are natural to a woman are very foreign to a male slave."
She saw the question on my face and chuckled. "Oh, you will see what I mean, and soon, I think. During the time of the baron's grandsire - yes, I was here at the time, doing the same job, though I was much younger, of course - a man was brought here. He was put through his paces, made to wear the clamps and the ring, forced to suffer through my ministrations. But, Duo, he never, ever, accepted his fate as gracefully as you have. And he was not even half as beautiful as you are."
With that, she urged me up from the tub, not saying another word, leaving me to my thoughts. She sluiced me off brusquely with a thick towel and again brushed my hair until it was nearly dry. She swiftly refastened the collar and reattached the golden clamps. That caused a brief wince, but I refused to acknowledge the discomfort. After what I'd just endured, the small pain was nothing.
I noticed Helen repressing a smile at my seemingly manly forbearance. I blushed as she took me by the arm, leading me towards the door. She opened it and pushed me before her into the sitting room. It was deserted so she called out for my trainer.
"My lord, he is ready."
Quatre appeared in the opposite doorway. He looked me up and down, his gaze lingering on the shining crown of my loosed hair. A grin lit his boyish features.
"Wonderful! Helen, you are truly amazing. I didn't think it was possible but he looks even more beautiful than before."
She accepted his praise with words of gratitude while the flush in my cheeks radiated down into my neck. I should have become used to the blonde's exuberant compliments by then, but they still caused an annoying reaction in my rather fair complexion. Quatre came to meet us and took Helen's hand. He turned it over and kissed the back with a courtly gesture.
"Until tomorrow night?" he asked.
"Until then, my lord. Goodnight, son," she teased as she turned to leave. I ducked my head to hide a smile, avoiding Quatre's curious glance.
"I'm glad you like Helen, Duo. She will be seeing to you every night that you're here so it's important that you become comfortable with her."
I nodded without meeting his gaze, knowing it would still hold a gleam of appreciation. I'd managed to go nearly an hour without my cock reacting inappropriately and I knew looking into Quatre's attractive aquamarine eyes would end my respectful run. He took hold of my arm, leaving the chain to dangle in front of me. With a gentle tug, he led me towards the doorway of the as-of-yet unexplored room.
As I was still looking down, I first noticed that the carpeting was different in the new space. Rather than the smoky gray of the sitting room, here the covering was done in a handsome, dark brown. I raised my gaze slowly, taking in the rich appointments such as the heavy, wooden wardrobe providing a contrast to the walls, which were colored a soft cream. No tapestries were hung in the room and the only other notable piece of furniture drew my riveted gaze.
The bed was large with a four-poster frame, each post draped with a brocade fabric that matched the carpet and was trimmed with gold thread, forming a canopy over the piece of furniture. The brown coverlet had been pulled back, revealing four, plump pillows and cream sheets. The room was a magnificent example of tasteful masculinity. Even as the bed filled the extent of my vision, I couldn't help but admire the skilled design.
Just then, I felt a presence behind me, and turned to see a figure in the doorway. The light in the bedroom was provided by only a few candles and was outmatched by the brilliance of the fire from the sitting room. As a result, I could not immediately identify the figure by sight, though my body knew without question. My breath quickened and my cock stirred predictably as it came into its master's presence once again.
Heero abandoned the doorway and stepped into the room, his dark-blue gaze fixed upon me. As Quatre had done, he raked his eyes over me, taking in every detail of my appearance. But unlike the handler's perusal, the baron's intense scrutiny brought to mind hot, summer moments spent with Hilde in the barn on my farm, her willing body accepting mine as I thrust into her with passionate adoration. My cock reacted instantly, thickening as it strained towards him. His eyes touched briefly upon the wayward flesh before coming to rest on my unrestrained hair, noting how a lock fell over my left shoulder and how the ends rested atop the curve of my ass.
I swallowed the nervous lump that had risen in my throat, his presence commanding my complete attention. He moved towards me, and looked into my eyes, utterly ignoring Quatre. Closer he came, until his entrancing features completely filled my vision.
"Good evening, Duo," he murmured, the sound whispering over my parted lips. Then he leaned towards me and, for the first time, pressed his firm mouth to mine.
(1) If my putting Helen in this role totally squicked you, you're not alone. I really squicked myself with this one!