Disclaimer: I own Gundam Wing. But I'm also certifiably insane, so don't expect that claim to hold up in court.... AND I knowingly DO NOT own the title "Teenage Dirtbag" I stole it from the band Wheatus because I'm lazy as shit and couldn't think of my own.

Pairings: 1xR, 2+R
Warnings: non-yaoi, duo pov, au (present day Ohio), ooc?, language, drug abuse (kidstuff), and ANGST as only high school can inspire.

Author's Notes: Sprung from the Wheatus song "Teenage Dirtbag," but takes quite a different turn. Please don't be afraid that this fic is technically 1xR, it really does focus on the growing relationship between Heero and Duo.

Summary: Duo forms an odd friendship with his crush's bad-boy boyfriend and it's one neither of them will forget.

Teenage Dirtbag
Part 3
by Granate

"Having a nice conversation, boys?" she asks, arms crossed. I want to give an emphatic 'no!' "Since you obviously enjoy it so much, I'll see you both tomorrow."

I turn around to give Heero a death-glare as she walks away. He looks uninterested. No skin off his nose, I'm sure. He has detention, like, every day. I reassemble my homework and we don't say anything for the rest of the time. He just stares out the window.

I get out of there as soon as I can and head to my friend Quatre's house. He's a really cool kid, plus he's got gobs of money and doesn't mind sharing his toys. It's practically guaranteed that at least two of our crew will be over there at any given time. We play video games, mess around on his computer(s), watch DVDs and indulge in his extensive collection of comics. The rest of us don't even bother to buy our own, we all just mooch off him. He's even let me look at his car. Like I said, Quatre is a real cool kid. With us, it's an even exchange because I give him discounts at the electronics store where I work part-time.

I'm right, Trowa, Nikol, and Sylvia are over there too. The three of them are arguing over the intricacies of some video game, as usual. I just grab a strawberry pop and flop down on the couch.

"Detention again?" Sylvia asks me. She's great girl, we've been friends since eighth grade.

"Yeah," I grumble, "tomorrow too." I wonder if I should tell them about my odd exchange with Heero Yuy. It's almost too embarrassing.

"That sucks," I get some sympathy from Quatre for a minute before he jabs Trowa in the ribs and steals the thick strategy book back. Those two are best friends, inseparable. Makes me smile. Until I remember the jerk responsible for my new plans for tomorrow afternoon.

"Yeah, and I have Heero Yuy to thank for it," I groan as I sit up.

"How's that?" Quatre asks.

How can I explain it? Will they even believe me? "He was talking to me and we got in trouble," I tell them the abbreviated version.

"Wait a minute," Nikol looks up from the TV. "You were talking to Heero Yuy?"

I shake my head, "Regrettably."

"I didn't know that Cretin was capable of human speech patterns!" Quatre exclaims. I decide to leave out the part where he corrected my calculus homework.

"Dude, if that guy talked to me, I think I'd just freeze in fear!" Nikol admits. "Do you know what he did to me once? He tackled me so hard in gym one time that it knocked the wind outta me. During touch football, mind you. Like he's too dumb to understand the words 'no tackling.' He's given some friends of mine a rough time too. I used to see him get in fights after school freshman year. Damn, I stay out of his way."

"I'd like to get in his way, that guy's hot. What did you talk about?" Sylvia asks.

How do I answer that? "Uhhhhh he was just bragging about Relena, that's all..." I mumble.

"I dunno man," Nikol shakes his head. "That's the strangest thing I've heard all day. I've never heard him say anything in four years."

I turn to Sylvia, "I don't get it! What do chicks see in that guy??"

"He's just hot," she shrugs, and takes a swig from her can. "Haven't you ever seen him in his gym shorts?"

"Spare us the details!" I say quickly, holding up a hand.

"Oh shit!" Nikol snorts loudly. "What if he ever finds out that you're totally sprung for his girlfriend!! Man, we'd be picking up parts of you from all over this town!"

I shift nervously on the couch. "Yeah, don't remind me..." I mutter.

"See, now, I want to know what guys see in girls like her!" Sylvia exclaims.

Nikol and I stare at her like she's growing a third eye.

"Oh please!" she exclaims. "Guys, she's an airhead! There's nothing in there!"

"Hey," I speak up, ready to come to her defense. "I did a school project with her once! She's not an airhead!"

Sylvia gives me a pathetic look. "Oh, you are so biased! You're looking through the goggles of loooove... Or thinking with your dick. Probably the latter! Who did all the work on that project? You did! I remember it! You even wrote her fuckin' part for the presentation!"

I scowl at her, but can't argue. She's right. About the project and what I was thinking with.

"You're just jealous!" Nikol teases her.

"Ha," Sylvia snorts indignantly, "I wouldn't trade my brain for her looks! No deal. Well, maybe if Heero Yuy came with the package..."

The two of us groan collectively.

The next day at school is pretty normal until after lunch. I'm walking to fifth period and I see Heero coming the other way. I pretend I don't see him, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't notice me. Until he spreads a palm over my chest and slams me into some convenient lockers. He did it so fast I didn't have time to fight back! He keeps walking like nothing happened.

"Asshole!" I shout after him as I try to salvage some dignity. It's all I can really do. What the fuck?! He can't do that to me! I'm a senior! For god's sake, I'm eighteen years old! I know I'm short and scrawny and my thyroid doesn't seem to realize this, but it's true!

I see him again right before detention, saying goodbye to Relena by the door like yesterday. It's like he feels me looking at them or something. He looks up and catches my eye before I can look away. He deliberately puts an arm around her hips and pulls her against him. I feel my face flaring red with anger again, and I quickly disappear.

I find a table where someone is already sitting in the other seat. Heero shows up late again and finds a seat a few tables away. I am very relieved. I wonder why he's picking on me all the sudden. God, why didn't I deny my feelings for Relena?

I glance over at him. He looks bored, sullen. Now this is what he's usually like. His blue eyes look grey, empty as he stares at nothing. I wonder if he can stare off into space like that for the full three hours, now that would be talent. Clearly, he's not abusing any substances today. I wonder if that's why he isn't talking or getting someone else in trouble. I wonder why he gave me such a hard time yesterday. Was it because I talked back? Maybe that made it more fun for him. Maybe I should have taken the Nikol Route, and frozen like a rabbit. Like maybe, if you don't move, he can't see you anymore.

I go back to the calculus packet I revived after yesterday. At least he's leaving me alone now. And he'll probably get bored of pushing me around pretty soon. Only two more months of this bullshit.

But he doesn't get bored of pushing me around. To the contrary, he does it every time he sees me, unless I scuttle away to the other side of the hall, or evade him somehow. It's so embarrassing. I see him, and I just know it's coming. He plants a hand on my chest, or he'll grab my backpack and push me into something. Even if it's a wide hallway, he'll keep pushing till I'm flat up against something, a wall, lockers, a door maybe. He's really strong, but it's never enough to hurt or make me fall down or anything. Just enough to make a point. And he always has this challenging sneer on his face, like we're playing some sort of game, and he wins if he flattens me, and I win if I get away. Like it's our private joke, but only he thinks it's funny.

This sounds weird, but it's become almost a game to me too. Strategy. Can I get to class a different way? He'll find me after a few days. How can evade him? What is the best course of action in a given situation? My friends have noticed. Mostly because he'll do it regardless of who I'm walking with. And they've seen me bolt off and squirrel my way through a crowded hall to avoid him. No sympathy there, they think it's hilarious too. Honestly, it's not that bad, I guess. It lacks a certain maliciousness of earlier bullying experiences. Heero Yuy isn't doing it to show off what a bad-ass he is to his friends, because he doesn't have any friends. He's just doing it because he thinks it's funny. My friends agree, it's funny when I squirm. They say if I weren't such a spaz, it wouldn't be so much fun for him.

What really irks me is the show he puts on with Relena. Ugh, it's disgusting. I've started keeping my eyes down at times when I might see them together, like before school and at lunch. It's sick, really. He looks right at me! With that challenging look again, like it's part of the game. Like he's saying that no matter how many times I manage to escape him in the hallways, he's still the ultimate winner. It really, really bugs me.

on to part 4

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