[Sequel to: "Racing with Secrets" Book 4 of the "Secrets" Arc]
Written: October, 2000
Pairings: (?X1) (1X2) (3X4) (5+S)
Category: Angst, Disturbing Content, AU, yaoi
Cumulatibe Warnings: Angst, disturbign content, yaoi, language, AU, sap, OOC
Disclaimers: I don't own the Gundam Wing Universe or any other anime characters I use here, just the parts of this story and some
characters that are new are truly mine [especially Laurel, she's *still* my daughter after all!]. Please don't sue me, all I've got is a broken
down car that hates me.
Note: Timeframe---after the war has ended and the Gundams were destroyed.
Heero Yuy, former pilot of the Wing Zero Gundam and savior to millions, sat despondently in solitary confinement in a maximum
He knew full-well the ramifications of his rash actions to save the life of the only person he ever loved, Duo Maxwell, and even though
those efforts were successful, he felt so very alone. This feeling surprised him, though. He had mentally prepared for it, or so he thought.
The stark realization that this would probably comprise the entirety of his world for the rest of his life was weighing heavily upon him.
Heero could not even recall exactly how many criminal acts he had perpetrated. He knew he had stolen several vehicles, injured a
paramedic while in the process of stealing an ambulance; also he had kidnapped a doctor, even though the man had gone voluntarily.
He'd been told he'd done so much more, but the worst thing he had done in the eyes of the law was that he had stolen a human heart, an
organ designated for another even if its original recipient had died prior to his arrival and the theft.
Most individuals in his position would have been railing at the injustice of such treatment, rebelling against what seemed an obvious
failure of the legal system to see a truth as simple as the fact that the heart in question would have been lost due to lack of time anyway.
Yet the former pilot of the Wing Gundam was certainly not a typical individual and his thoughts lay with others not himself. After sitting
here for several days, all he really wished for was a way to send a message to the man he loved to let him know everything was going to
be all right, even if he himself didn't believe it. Another lie, another secret, another mistruth; he no longer cared. He only wanted to
protect the life he had sacrificed everything to save.
Without a watch or a clock, he had gotten accustomed to the rhythms of the guards' rounds and planned to ask an important question.
"Excuse me, sir!" he called out as yet another unrecognized face walked by simply to confirm he was still in there.
"What da' ya' want, dirt ball?" came the scornful reply.
Heero shook off the insult since it was milder than many he'd received since being brought here. "I'd like to send a letter if possible. How
can I arrange to do so?"
"Hmm, I don't really know. You haven't been here long enough to establish a reputation either way, but I'll check with Captain Ryuzouji
since he's in charge of you." The guard leered maliciously. "But don't get your hopes up, he's still mad about being stuck here since you
"Thank you, that's all I ask," Heero responded. The guard simply walked away mumbling something about most convicts not having any
manners at all and now "golden boy" shows up and is as peaceful as a lamb. Some "ruthless killer" he turned out to be!
An unknown amount of time later, Jack Ryuzouji showed up at his cell, looking annoyed as usual. "What's this I hear about you wanting
to write a letter, Yuy? You should realize we aren't about to give a trained assassin a potential weapon like a pen or pencil!" The larger
man snickered expecting Heero to become angry. To his surprise, he never did.
"I realize that, Jack." The two men had dropped any formal titles during their enforced time together in the hospital after Heero's coma.
"It's just that I'd like to find a way to get a message out to my friends that everything's okay here and not to worry too much. You met
them yourself, you can probably imagine what I mean."
Jack snorted in disgust. "Oh, yeah, I know what you mean! They call here about ten times a day just to make sure you haven't killed
yourself or something stupid. Come to think of it, maybe a message would be a good idea. Maybe then they'd get off of my back all the
time!" Jack looked thoughtful for a moment then added, "But I'm no damned secretary to take dictation or any of that shit, I'll see if I can
scrounge up a video recorder and you can send them a video."
"That would be very helpful, Jack. Good idea. If by any chance you can't find one, just ask Quatre Winner to send one over when he
calls again. He can afford to cover it." Heero looked hopeful for the first time in two days.
"Fine, then." He glanced at his watch and Heero had to bite back a question about what time it was, with no windows in sight, it could
be the middle of the night for all he knew, and the staff made it a point to keep the prisoners time-disoriented. "I should be able to find a
camera and a disk somewhere. So think of what you want to say, because you'll only get a few minutes to do it in, got it?"
"No problem, Jack! I wish I could repay the favor, but," and he held out his hands helplessly, "there's not much I can do for you in
"Just stay there and don't cause any problems and I'll be satisfied." Jack had tried to erase the image of Heero's fiancÚ, Duo Maxwell,
from his mind's eye, but never could. Now, this kid was a model prisoner, never complaining or causing trouble. Against his better
judgement, Jack had started to actually respect the guy instead of hating him as he had during the long boring days when Heero was in a
Heero waited patiently, something he was accustomed to doing in the name of battle strategy, but doing so because there was no other
option galled him; yet he did it. He had changed; fundamentally, deeply, almost completely, yet he himself hadn't noticed. The eternal
observer was oblivious of how drastically he himself had changed; the irony was profound yet disturbing.
If Heero Yuy truly knew how much his world was changing and how rapidly everything was spinning out of control, even he would have