Part the Epilogue: A Toast to the Witch
"Zechs, a married man," Duo said, taking in the sight of his former
lover in his Armani tux, looking devilishly handsome in the warm,
late spring sunlight. "You know, I never thought I'd see the day. All
this time I kept expecting you to be pulling everyone's leg. That at
the altar, you and Wufei would turn around, yell 'Psyche!' then run
off to Tahiti laughing your heads off."
Zechs grinned and took a swig of his champagne. "We'll still be
running off to Tahiti, if it makes you feel better."
Duo snorted and turned his attention from his friend to the crowd
mingling on the Peacecraft estate grounds. In the past he'd always
felt uncomfortable and out of place in these kinds of social
settings, but the past few months living with Heero had given him a
kind of self-confidence he hadn't realized he'd been missing. He
scanned the crowd and caught sight of his lover, talking animatedly
to an older gentleman and his wife, who appeared to be enjoying the
younger-looking man's company. Duo smiled to himself and wondered
what they'd think if they knew Heero outdated them by a couple of
"Can't keep your eyes off him?" Zechs joked, nudging Duo with his
"Can you blame me?" Duo replied, giving Heero a little wave when the
other man saw that he was looking at him. Heero said something to the
couple, excusing himself and heading in Duo and Zechs' direction.
"Ah, no. I suffer from the same thing myself. Although, I seem to
have lost sight of my wayward husband."
Duo smiled, tugging at his own expensive waistcoat. He'd shed the
stuffy jacket as soon as he thought it was polite. He'd been proud
and honored to stand up for Zechs during the ceremony, and even
though Zechs and Wufei's union wasn't legal in the eyes of the law,
everyone present could feel the love and devotion between the two,
even when the taller groom pinched the best man's ass on their way
back down the aisle after the ceremony.
"Maybe he wised up and left," Duo joked, grabbing a fresh glass of
champagne from a passing waiter.
"He's probably just stuffing his face with hors d'oevres. He's been
on a strict diet for the past few months. Said he wanted to fit into
his tux." Zechs rolled his eyes. "I swear, he's been worse than a
woman these past few weeks."
Duo snorted. "Don't let him hear you say that. You might be sleeping
on the floor of your honeymoon hut."
"Like he'd last ten minutes after I undressed and flexed my..."
"Heero!" Duo jumped the last couple of feet and latched on to his
lover's arm. "Enjoying yourself?"
Heero nodded, stealing Duo's glass and tasting the
champagne. "Immensely. I just met Lord and Lady Wynstae. Lord Wynstae
collects antiques from the Victorian era of Great Britain. I was
tempted to tell the man I knew her..."
Duo blinked. "You *slept* with Queen *Victoria*?!"
Heero laughed. "No, I did not." There was a pause. Duo waited for the
kicker. "But I did enjoy the company of her daughter, Victoria
"Didn't she become the empress of Germany?" Zechs asked, intrigued.
"That was after my time."
Duo had to consciously tell himself to close his mouth.
Zechs slung his arm around Heero's shoulders. "So, Heero. Are you
prepared to go it alone for the next couple of weeks?"
Heero straightened his shoulders. "I am. Although, I'm afraid if your
sous-chef, Henri, makes a pass at me one more time, I might have an
unfortunate accident between your French rolling pin and his ass."
Duo laughed. "Just let me have five minutes alone with him, love."
"The rolling pin would take less than thirty seconds," Heero replied
dryly. "I think he'd get the point."
"I'm not so sure," Zechs said. "Henri likes it rough."
Both Heero and Duo stared at him.
"What? I hadn't met Wufei then." He patted Heero heavily on the
back. "Don't worry. I have my faith in you."
"I shall not let you down."
Duo smiled again. He knew Heero was nervous about being left alone in
the restaurant while Zechs and Wufei were on their honeymoon, but he
had confidence in his lover. He took the champagne glass back from
Heero and sipped at it, marveling at how life worked out sometimes.
After the curse had been broken, Heero had moved into Duo's small
apartment. They'd been sad to leave their hotel - Zechs' hotel now,
but Duo had to go back to work, which left Heero alone in the
apartment during the day.
Those first couple of weeks were trying. Heero had no birth
certificate, no Social Security number, no identification. Legally,
he did not exist. Zechs had helped on that part. He knew a guy who
knew a guy who created Heero a set of papers that even the most
diligent expert would have trouble telling them apart from the real
thing. Heero was now Heero Yuy, a twenty-eight-year-old, half
Japanese man originally from Hawaii (it explained the Asian look
about him, and for all Heero knew, his mother may have been from
ancient Japan). And thanks to Zechs' generous offer of a job, he was
now an apprentice pastry chef at La Boheme. Though Heero didn't think
he would stick with pastry, as he discovered he had a flair for more
exotic, savory dishes... dishes he had grown up with but had been
lost through time. But working under Zechs would get him experience
and look good on his résumé when he felt ready to apply to a
respected cooking school.
Zechs clapped him on the back again. "I'm sure you won't." He turned
back to Duo. "So how are the two of you enjoying your new apartment?"
"Apartment?" Duo snorted. "More like a friggin' palace! Sometimes I
get lost in the place for weeks. Heero has to send out a search party
for me." He and Heero had realized quickly that Duo's tiny apartment
wasn't really suited for two people. Though Duo made a decent living,
and Heero hadn't yet gone to work for Zechs, they'd worried about
affording a bigger place. That's when Wufei had suggested Heero see
if the medallion - which had turned back into a regular, if ancient,
coin - was worth anything.
It had apparently been worth quite a lot. More than either one of
them had even dreamed of. The dealer they'd taken it to nearly had a
heart attack when they'd shown it to him. Apparently, there had only
been four of that type of coin in existence. Now there were five. And
after verifying its authenticity, Heero had let go of the last bit of
his past and had come out a very rich man. They bought a luxurious
apartment overlooking the ocean and put the rest away when Heero
started earning good money at the restaurant.
"We like it very much, thank you," Heero replied, nudging Duo with
"Ow. Yeah. Lots of room. Big kitchen for Heero to play in. Big TV for
me to play video games on. It's all good," Duo said in
agreement. "We'll have to have you and Wufei over for dinner when you
get back from Tahiti."
"We would be delighted," Zechs replied. He opened his mouth as if to
say something else, but was interrupted.
"Hah-loo, Heeroo." A staggering body bumped into Duo, pushing him out
of the way. Duo scowled as Relena latched onto his lover's arm and
breathed into his face. From the face Heero pulled, it was obvious
Relena had been imbibing too much of the celebratory champagne. "I
thought I shaw you over here."
Duo ground his teeth together, ready to knock the pink harpy out of
the way if she didn't get her grubby claws off his man. No matter how
many times he and Heero had to explain to her that yes, the curse was
broken, and no, he still didn't like women, she never seemed to get
Heero more tactfully removed his arm from Relena's grasp. "How are
today, Miss Peacecraft?"
Relena made a face. "F-fine. Just dandy. Forced to shtand here in
these shoes, shmiling at all these people come to shelebrate this
farsh of a wedding..."
"Relena, no one forced you to be here," Zechs said, with a long,
suffering sigh. "If you are that uncomfortable, you may leave."
Relena stuck her tongue out at her brother. "You can't make me do
She swallowed her words when Zechs reached into his breast pocket and
pulled out a photograph. Her face turned white and she stepped away
from them. "Ah, if you'll excushe me, I have to... go get shomething
Duo shot Heero a glance and tried to hide his smile in his cocktail
napkin. He knew he really ought to feel sorry for her, but it was
hard to feel sympathy for someone who lacked any herself. He could
only hope one day she'd change, or meet someone who would bring out
the good in her. She was his best friend's only relative, after all.
"I never thought to ask, Zechs, but what exactly is that a picture
of?" Duo asked after a moment.
"This? This is a naughty picture of Wufei that I took last week,"
Zechs replied, slipping it back into his breast pocket.
Heero snickered and Duo grinned. "So what do you have on her?"
Zechs grinned. "She doesn't know that though, so if you don't mind
keeping this on the down-low?"
"S-sure," Duo said, confused. "But, well... you obviously *know*
something on her, even if you don't have proof."
"I do. And it did happen during the Fourth of July picnic. It seems
my dear sister slipped away from the festivities and down to the boat
house with a paramour..."
"Is that all?" Duo asked, rolling his eyes. "And how did you find
"Well, I myself had thought to do the same thing. That's when I found
them. My dear sister... with her best friend, Dorothy Catalonia.
Let's just say either my sister was giving Dorothy mouth-to-mouth or
there was some serious lesbian snogging going on."
Duo felt as though his eyes were trying to bug out of his head. He
glanced at Heero and saw that his lover was having a similar
reaction. "You mean..."
"Yes. My sister is a 'friend of Dorothy' ... in every sense."
Duo groaned. Heero rolled his eyes.
Zechs drained the last of his champagne and set the glass
down. "Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure talking to you, but if you
would excuse me, I think I would like to molest my husband before we
cut the cake."
"We'll see you before you leave," Heero said, nodding at the man.
Duo leaned heavily against the terrace wall after Zechs had left. He
sighed and tugged at the collar of his dress shirt again. "I forgot
about the cake," he moaned, closing his eyes. "I think I'm supposed
to give a speech."
Heero moved over to him and began to rub his shoulders. "Tired?"
"A little. I hadn't realized just how raucous a bachelor party could
be when both members of the 'bridal' party are bachelors. How Zechs
and Wufei looked so wide-eyed and bushy-tailed this afternoon, I
"You look pretty good yourself," Heero replied, leaning in to nibble
along Duo's jaw. "Good enough to eat, even."
Duo tilted his head back and grinned at his lover. "What say we ditch
the cake-cutting and find somewhere quiet so you can have a...
The wicked glint in Heero's eyes told Duo he wouldn't mind doing that
at all. "Where? The house is full of people, and the boat house is
apparently a little too popular."
"Um..." Duo scanned the ground, his eyes alighting on the black
stretch limousine waiting to take Wufei and Zechs to the airport
later that evening. "Come on," he said, taking hold of Heero's
hand. "Let's christen their limo for them."
"You sure they won't miss us during the cake-cutting?"
"Trust me. I think Zechs will understand. He's ditched me to have sex
in the car often enough. I just want to return the favor."
Heero laughed and wrapped his arms around Duo as they made their way
stealthily toward the limo. "You know, if we get back in time, remind
me to make a toast to the witch who cursed me."
"Why on earth for?" Duo said, looking around to make sure no one was
watching as he opened the back door to the limo.
"Without her, I would have never met you." He slid inside the car and
pulled Duo in after him.
"And without Relena, I never would have stolen you," Duo said,
grinning from his position in Heero's lap. "So I guess I should be
grateful to her."
"Remind me to thank her later," Heero said, sliding a hand into Duo's
lap. Duo hissed and pulled the door closed behind them. And if Zechs
and Wufei wondered why their seat was a bit sticky when they left,
they never said anything. And proceeded to make it stickier.
My thanks to everyone who read and enjoyed and commented on this fic.
Originally, this was just supposed to be a simple little fluff
piece... but it grew out of control somewhere around chapter three
and became a lengthy monster. I suppose this is what I get for
reading one too many cheesy romance novels in a month. It's a bad,
dirty habit. Really. And now it's over. I'm both relieved and sad,
but it had to end sometime! Thanks again, everyone... I really
appreciated the comments!