I Trust You Forever
"Where are you going?"
A tenor voice stopped Duo from walking out of the house. He turned
around and looked at Heero who was standing a couple of feet behind
him. "Out." His voice was gruff and his eyes dared the Japanese boy to
"With him again?"
Duo knew well who Heero referred as *him*. "Yes."
With that he slammed the door shut behind him and walked to the garage
where his car stored. He was getting in to his car when he heard the
door he just slammed being opened and Heero spoke up, "I trust you,
Duo. Just come back to have dinner together tonight, okay?"
Duo's only answer is to close his car's door and start his car,
leaving his Japanese lover in the steps of the house where they had
lived together for almost a year after the war ended. He was angry, it
was clearly showned from his frowning face. Recently, Heero had been
so fussy about where he went, with whom, and why.
It was all started a month ago when Heero took him to his favorite
singer's concert as his birthday present. He was so happy at that time
and nearly fainted when he got a chance to talk with his idol when he
chased him to the back of the stage after the show was over. When they
got back home, Duo was practically glowing and attacked his Japanese
lover with kisses and caresses as his way to show how happy he was
with the gift.
What he never thought was Sakuya , the singer actually remembered
him and called him the next day, asking him whether he could be his
tour guide during his one week vacation here on earth. It was his
dream comes true! Duo quickly agreed to it and they quickly became
close friends since then. Not surprisingly since they met almost
everyday and went out together to see many interesting places.
At first, Heero was okay with it. He never questioned anything and
always smiled to Duo when Duo said he would go out to meet Sakuya. But
as the first week passed and Sakuya announced he got additional
vacation, Heero began to change. He started to ask where he had been,
what was he doing, and not seldom glaring and snapping at Sakuya when
the singer drove him home.
The third week was worse. Heero followed Sakuya and him to a
restaurant where they usually stopped for lunch and unceremoniously
dragged Duo from there, leaving Sakuya alone. When they arrived at
home, the Japanese boy was angry and accused Sakuya of flirting and
taking advantage from Duo.
Duo was angry as well from the humiliation of being dragged out from
the restaurant and exploded at the accusation. He only accompanied
Sakuya on his vacation. They never did anything that surpassed the
friendship limit and it hurt him when Heero didn't believe his words.
That was their first fight and ended up with Duo sleeping in the
The next days were no better for both of them. Duo was often out with
Sakuya because he didn't want to meet Heero's angry face. He also
never returned to sleep in the bedroom as an act of anger for Heero
never allowed Sakuya to step inside their house again. This very
morning was the last straw for Duo when Heero asked him to leave
Sakuya and never meet the singer again.
"Right now I'd rather leave a person who can't trust his own lover
like you than him."
Duo could see Heero's eyes widen and his face pale when he growled the
sentence. It was as if Heero never thought Duo would ever think about
doing it. Although still deep in his anger, Duo felt a satisfaction at
Heero's reaction. He turned on his heel and walked toward the door.
"Damn!" The ex Deathscythe Hell pilot hit his wheel and sighed in
frustation and anger. When Heero said he trusted him, he had hurt Duo
more with that sentence. Heero had said it, not because he trusted
Duo, but because he didn't want Duo to leave.
"Hey." Bariton voice that greeted him made Duo realize he had arrived
in front of Sakuya's place. Looking at the smiling face, Duo felt his
anger lightened a bit. He smiled slightly and moved to passenger seat
to let Sakuya hopped into the driver seat. The singer had a thing for
driving and at the first time he let Sakuya drive, Duo knew he could
be a racer if not a singer.
Sakuya just reached 20 and was only shorter an inch than Duo's tall
form. Dressed in black and leather like Duo, he is a lady killer for
every woman he ran into. Like Heero, Sakuya also had Japanese blood in
him, adding exquisite impression on his already beautiful feature. His
hair was as black as raven and a little neater than Heero.
Heero.... The name made Duo's smile faltered. He quickly set aside
the fight they just had and decided to have great time with Sakuya.
They went to have lunch and then played in Disneyland. Somehow, Duo
felt restless, but his pride was still strong to worry about his
Japanese lover. He threw himself in every game there, wanting to
forget an image of shocked Prussian blue eyes and pale oriental face.
It was late at night when they drove back toward Sakuya's house. When
the car arrived in front of the singer's house, Sakuya turned off the
machine and looked at Duo, frowning. "You don't look like yourself."
"What do you mean?" Duo grunted. His mood had broken as he realized
dinner time had long gone and wondered if Heero waited for him. One
thing for sure, he knew hell would break loose when he arrived at
"You looked upset."
Duo looked at the eyes that had the same color as him and sighed,
slumping back onto his seat. "I had a fight with Heero."
"Again?" Sakuya looked disturbed
"Maybe the last....." Duo mumbled.
"What do you mean?"
Having been close for almost a month, Duo had come to trust Sakuya and
told the singer about the event before he came here.
"What do you think I should do to make Heero trust me?" Duo sighed,
feeling tired suddenly when he finished his story. He didn't want to
come home to find an angry Heero. He wanted his old Heero back. His
Heero who always welcomed him home with a slight smile reserved for
Sakuya fell silent for a while and Duo was about to ask him again when
he spoke up. "Why don't you just leave him?"
Duo was really surprised and whirled to look at Sakuya so fast that he
could hear his neck's bones protesting at his fast movement. "What did
"Leave him." Sakuya repeated flatly, eyes watching the road.
"Leave Heero?" Duo repeated dumbly, trying to get the concept into his
"You said yourself that you better leave him than leaving me."
Duo looked to the front and fell into silent, processing what Sakuya
had said. Yes he said the words but he never thought of seriously
"You can find another boyfriend, Duo." Sakuya continued again.
"Boyfriend? Who wants be my boyfriend if they know I'm an ex Gundam
pilot." Duo snorted. He still remembered the days when the war was
just over. Every girl and guy he dated turned him down when he told
them he was an ex Gundam pilot. They were afraid of him, he knew that.
But hell, if they couldn't accept the fact, how could he hope they
would accept him fully then? Hilde was not afraid of him, but she had
had a boyfriend and Duo wouldn't do anything to endanger her
happiness. Duo still remembered how lonely he was, until Heero
appeared in front of his doorstep. From that day, Heero filled his
days, filled his heart......
Duo blinked and turned at the singer. "What did you say?"
Sakuya took Duo's hand and looked at him seriously. "I want to be your
Duo was surprised and speechless. He remembered Heero accusing Sakuya
as a flirt..... Heero was angry with Sakuya..... Duo blinked again as
a hand caressed his cheek.
"Duo, since our first meeting, I have fallen for you. The deal is only
one week, but I can't leave you. I want to be with you always." Sakuya
spoke slowly and leant forward, invading Duo's personal space. "We
have had great time together in this month, Duo. Leave Heero and come
live with me."
Duo saw Sakuya's face getting closer. He knew Sakuya want to kiss him,
but he didn't know what he had to do. He was still in shock and
couldn't think clearly while his cheek being caressed so gently. He
missed this feeling. It had been long time since Heero and him got
time to cuddle or just to hug. It had been long time since he saw
Heero's shy but happy smile when he kissed him or caressed his cheek.
Come to think it .... when did Heero last smile?
//Just a week ne? Go and have fun time with Sakuya. It's not every day
you can be with your idol. Don't worry about me. It's just a week and
then I'll have you by myself again.// Heero's understanding eyes and
Heero's smiling face flashed in his mind and Duo found himself pushing
Sakuya away. "No!"
"No, Sakuya. I won't leave Heero." Duo trembled and tried to make a
distance with Sakuya as far as he could. He felt he had done something
wrong, something bad..... Unconsciously, his mind replayed and
searched for he and Heero's conversation during this month.
"He doesn't trust you. There's no need to stay with a person who can't
trust you." Sakura spoke up.
//You're going out with Sakuya again? I thought we would watch the
movie together tonight.// A disappointed face of his Japanese lover
flashed in his mind. //One week has passed, you shouldn't go out with
him too often.// "No.... he trusts me. Heero trusts me..... " Duo
"If he trusted you, he wouldn't have followed us to the restaurant a
week ago and dragged you out of there. He even snapped at me, in front
of so many people." Sakuya pointed out.
Duo remembered that day clearly. He and Sakuya were talking and joking
in the restaurant. The singer was telling a joke and kissed Duo's hand
as a part of the joke. Suddenly Heero entered the restaurant and
dragged Duo away, snapping something to Sakuya that Duo didn't
remember because he was filled with anger and humiliation at that
time. //The deal is for one week only. He is flirting and taking
advantage of you now, Duo.// Heero's angry eyes flared in his mind.
Angry, hurt, and lonely......
Duo felt like a filter just lifted from his eyes. "He trusts me, but
he doesn't trust you."
"Wha..what?" Sakuya was surprised.
Duo looked at him sharply. "You were trying to flirt with me at that
time, weren't you? The joke about kissing my hand was just one of your
ways to touch me in intimate manner."
Sakuya didn't answer and Duo didn't need the answer anyway for it was
obvious. There was something more important nagging in his mind.
Something about Heero and Sakuya had said.... "What do you mean by the
"Huh?" For a second Duo saw panic in Sakuya's eyes
"The deal. You and Heero talked about one week deal. What is it?" Duo
narrowed his eyes.
It was clearly a lie since Sakuya didn't look straight at Duo and
fidgeted instead. Duo growled threateningly. "I hate liars, Sakuya. I
don't want to befriend with a liar, let alone thinking about being his
Sakuya swallowed and was silent for some seconds before speaking so
low that Duo almost missed it. "He paid me ... hired me to accompany
you for one week."
Duo found it was hard to compute the answer and became confused.
"Heero paid you... what for... you're rich.... "
"It's part of your birthday present. He made an arrangement with my
manager and paid us as much as my price for one week concert...."
Duo was stunned. Stunned and shocked. Now all became clear for him.
..... He had been wondering how Sakuya knew his phone's number, but
now he could guess who told it to him. Damn, he should have realized
"Duo," Sakuya's voice brought Duo back from his troubled mind. "I know
I was paid, but I don't pretend to have fun with you. I'm serious when
I said I loved you. That's why I took vacation so I can stay with you
some time longer."
Duo wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Heero paid Sakuya to
please him. But at the end, Sakuya didn't need to be paid to do that
and that made them fight. How ironic. It was as if Heero paid a rival
to take Duo from him. And he, Duo Maxwell, was stupid enough to
believe the rival instead of his own lover.
"I don't care you are an ex terrorist or not and I'm sure my family
can understand about us. You once told me you wanted to know what it
felt to live in big family. I can give you that. Come live with me,
Duo and you will have my family as your own." Sakuya kept talking and
every word he said only brought Duo back to think about his Japanese
lover. He could get a family if he left Heero and stayed with Sakuya,
but then what about Heero?
Somehow, Sakuya's voice seemed so far away and Duo found himself back
into this morning when he and Heero were quarelling.
//Stop meeting that guy, Duo. He is not your lover that you have to be
with him everyday. He is an idol, an singer. He only has to ask and
everyone will be willing to do anything for him. He can ask them to
have fun, watch movie, have dinner, and so on. He isn't so lonely that
you have to keep him company. He has his family waiting and caring for
him every time he goes home. Leave him, Duo!// Duo felt his throat
choked. Heero's words from this morning echoed inside his head,
pounding the realization to sink deep in it.
Heero didn't have any family..... Heero didn't have anybody else who
wanted to have fun with him, to watch movie, to have dinner........ To
be there when he was home............ to be his family....... Heero
only had him........ Only him.
// I trust you, Duo. Just come back to have dinner together tonight,
How long?? God, how long since they had dinner together? Duo felt
numb. Since their first fight, he always went out with Sakuya every
night. Did Heero eat alone in their empty house? Did Heero sleep alone
in that big bed with no one to cuddle? Duo knew how well Heero liked
to cuddle. The Japanese boy once told him, he felt safe and there was
no nightmare when he slept in Duo's arms.
Oh God, oh God. What had he done? No wonder Heero was angry and
jealous. When he was having fun with Sakuya, Heero was left alone in
their house. Although they were fighting, Heero always waited for him
for coming home, late or not. Yes, the Japanese boy was angry when he
opened the door late at night, but Heero still waited for him
nevertheless. Duo remembered he always ignored Heero and went straight
to the couch, promptly falling asleep. No smiles for Heero, no sweet
words, no kisses, and no hugs either. Heero was truly alone.
Duo felt the mist on his eyes as he remembered Heero's pale face when
he told him whom he preferred to leave. Heero might have taken it
seriously. He gritted his teeth and tightened his fists, refusing to
cry. No time to fall in guilt, misery and self pity. He had to fix the
mistakes he made. He didn't want to lose Heero. Never ever.
"Sakuya." Duo spoke up in dark and bitter tone, cutting Sakuya's
rambling. "I love Heero. I won't leave him"
Duo held up his hand, stopping Sakuya. "I like you as my friend, no
more. But since you don't feel the same way as I do, I think it's
better for us not to meet again. I don't want to lose Heero because of
Sakuya was shocked. "You spoke as if Heero is more important than me."
"He is." Duo answered flatly. His face, for once, was very serious,
making Sakuya taken aback. "I love him. I need him like he needs me."
"Duo, I ..." Sakuya tried to touch Duo's arm, only to have his hand
"Please leave, Sakuya. I still have something to do."
"Leave or I'll force you to do it." Duo's tone left no argument.
Sakuya bit his lower lip, looking pleadingly at Duo with his puppy
statement that often won his way through people. But when Duo showed
no effect or nor relented, Sakuya knew he had lost. Bowing his head,
he stepped out of the car. As soon as his feet hit the ground, Duo and
the car disappeared into the dark of night.
It was past midnight when Duo arrived at home. He opened the front
door slowly, hoping to see Heero waiting for him. But the Japanese boy
was nowhere in sight.
"Heero??" Duo called hesitantly. The house seemed so empty and silent.
Was this how Heero felt for the past weeks? Where was he? Duo's heart
did a flip flop at the thought Heero leaving him. He ran his eyes
around the living room and noticed the door to the kitchen opened
Praying to God to give him a chance to fix his mistake, Duo slowly
headed toward the kitchen door and pushed it.
Foul smell hit his nose first and Duo was panicked when he saw Heero
sitting on a chair, his head slumped on the table. His eyes were shut
and his face wet with almost dried tears. God! Please let it not be
what he was thinking Heero had done. Duo quickly approached the
obviously unconscious boy and felt relieved when he heard the soft
snore. Heero was just sleeping. Further checking showed him that the
smell came from the untouched dinner in front of the sleeping boy.
Duo winced in guilt. Heero might have waited him to come home. He
could picture the sight of Heero waiting for him to have dinner....
The sight of Heero looking at the clock on the wall every five minutes
and still waiting for him although it had passed dinner time.....
Heero kept waiting, waiting and waiting, until he felt Duo was not
going to come back and cried to sleep.
"Gomen, Heero." Duo felt like crying to see his Japanese lover so
forlorn. But he knew it was not the time to shed tears. It was time to
apologize and make up to Heero.
Duo noticed Heero was trembling slightly in his sleep. He gathered the
blanket from the couch in the living room and put it over the Japanese
"I'm so sorry, Heero." Duo kissed Heero's cheek apologetically and
then gathered his smaller lover into his arms, carrying him into their
bedroom. After the war, Duo's height had increased greatly while Heero
only got taller a few inches. Duo enjoyed looking down to Heero while
the Japanese boy had to look up at him. Using his taller body as
advantage, he often trapped the Japanese boy within his arms and under
his head, hugging him tightly and not letting go till he was
"Duo..?" A low murmur brought Duo back from his musing. Duo looked
down and saw Heero's eyes open slowly. "You're back...." Heero's voice
held disbelief tone in it.
"Yes, Heero. I'm back." Having arrived at the bedroom, Duo lowered his
Japanese lover on the bed and then sat down next to Heero, looking
down at him. "I never want to leave you, koi."
Heero smiled slightly. "Thank you."
"What for?" Duo tilted his head slightly in confusion.
"For coming back to me. I know I'm wrong. I have no right to prevent
you from seeing Sakuya. I shouldn't have asked you to leave Sa... "
That was as far as Heero could talk before Duo's mouth coming down on
him, silencing him totally.
Duo kissed Heero tenderly, pouring his love, guilt, regret, and
apologize in one single kiss. No tongue play, no wet kisses. It was
only a touch of lips to lips. A kiss of pure love.
"There's no Sakuya between us. There are only you and me. Together,
now, tomorrow, and forever. I'm the one who is wrong. I have ignored
you. I have said something that I didn't mean it. I have .... "
This time, it was Heero's turn to silence Duo. That night, they
started making up for the lost days.
Sakuya ended his vacation the next day and left for his next concert,
never disturbing Duo and Heero's lives anymore.
Duo told his lover for his birthday next year, he wanted a present, which wouldn't separate Heero from him.
Heero just smiled and nodded.
Next year, Duo got a ring.
 Singer + Kaikan Phrase = Sakuya, well just borrowing his name....