Disclaimer: I don't own the gundam boys or 'Nix'

Pairing: 2x2, 2x1, implied R+D
Rating: NC-17
Warning: yaoi, lemon, PWP, head lice *snickers*, Relena bashing?, stupidness, masturbation, slight yuri

Note: I'm back from the dead. *evil grin* So here's another PWP for the duel (is it still on? ^_^;;). Also, I don't know anything about Head Lice, I'm making this stuff up. But, I think I might be correct. I'm just using what memories I had when I had lice as a kid. Yeah, yeah. I had head lice when I was small, but didn't we all?

Summary: Duo got head lice... from Relena

the duel: 2X1 fires a shot

Duo's Bad Hair Day
by Dia-Chan

It was a quiet Sunday morning, until a loud piercing scream echoed throughout the safe house. Jumping out of bed with his gun withdrawn, Heero Yuy stalked out of his bedroom to find Duo Maxwell sitting on the floor in the living room, two hands buried in his hair, and scratching like there was no tomorrow. The braided boy had his hair loose, cascading down his back in complete disarray.

"Heero!" Duo looked up at him with wide violet eyes. His hands were scratching furiously at his scalp and he had the most pathetic look on his face. "My head won't stop itching! Do something!"

"Hn." Tucking his gun back into his spandex space, Heero repressed a grin as he stepped up behind Duo and forced the braided boy to drop his hands.

Duo had been scratching his head for the last several days, but he had chose not to say anything. Now, as he looked through the chestnut mass, Heero found the answer. White eggs resembling dandruff clung to the roots of his hair, and every once in a while he would see a little bug hopping back and forth.

"Baka." Heero stood up and hurried over to the kitchen to wash his hands. "You've got uku's." (ookoo's)

"Nani?!" Duo jumped to his feet, hands already buried in his hair as he followed Heero with a crazed look. "What do you mean I have uku's?! What the hell is uku's?!"

Washing his hands thoroughly, Heero looked over his shoulder. "Uku's are head lice."

Duo's beautiful heart-shaped face paled. "He-head lice?" Violet eyes threatened to spill over in tears. "Get it out!" Panic swept over him as he untangled his fingers from his hair, vision clouding as he thought of little bugs camping out in his beautiful hair. "Get rid of it Heero! Shoot it!" The braided boy made a dive for his gun, uncaring that his actions were quite stupid.

Gripping the handle of his gun, Heero raised it away from the panicked boy. "Relax Duo. I'll go get the medication for you."

"RELAX? You expect me to RELAX? I've got bugs in my hair!" Duo stared at Heero incredulously. The Wing pilot obviously didn't know just how much his hair meant to him. "How did I get bugs in my hair?" Violet eyes narrowed with suspicion as he glared at the stoic pilot. "It was you wasn't it?! You put bugs in my hair!" Duo's voice resembled a whine, even to his own ears... sounding a lot like... "RELENA!!!! I used her brush a couple days ago!"

Prussian blue eyes widened with shock. The shock quickly gave way to amusement, causing him to use all his training skills to stop the flow of laughter threatening to spill from his lips. "Hn."

Murder was all that filled Duo's mind as he raced for the vid phone and dialed up Relena's number. It rang several times before the screen in front of him lit up and a tired looking Relena answered. "Darlian."

"You! You gave me head lice!" Duo screamed. His hands thrashed around at his statement, glaring daggers at the shocked blond girl. "You! You.Die!" Without thinking, Duo reached for Heero's gun again and shot the phone.

Duo swung around, and Heero realized Duo was in Shinigami mode. The braided pilot was trembling with rage and he pointed his gun straight at Heero. "Get.Cure.Now!"

Biting back his amusement, Heero simply nodded and left the house.

When Heero was gone, Duo couldn't help it as his hands dove back into his hair, scratching furiously. Fuck the bugs. The bugs were going to die.


Returning home, Heero found that the house was completely quiet. He pulled out his gun in habit, stepping through the front door cautiously. His blue eyes scanned the room, hunting for signs of his enraged partner. "Duo?" He called, tentatively.

"In here!" There was a muffled reply, coming from the kitchen.

Sighing with relief, Heero held out the brown paper bag filled with 'Nix' and stepped into the kitchen. His jaw dropped at the sight he saw. Duo was lying back on the counter, his head dipped back in the kitchen sink. As he stepped closer, he could see that the sink was plugged with water and ice cubes. "Duo?" His eyes held his unspoken question, meeting Duo's contented heart-shaped face.

"I'm numbing my head so that it won't itch," Duo said simply. The braided boy had obviously calmed down. Duo's eyes flickered over to the bag Heero held questioningly. "Is that it? What do I have to do?"

Pulling out several boxes from the bag, Heero handed one to Duo. "I'm going to have to help you." Heero looked down and added quietly. "Since you're hair is so long."

Reading over the instructions, Duo nodded his head and sat up. He headed towards the bathroom-not bothering to look and see if Heero was following.

"Where should I sit?" Duo asked.

Scanning the bathroom, Heero swallowed before saying, "The tub."

For a long time, Heero had been deep in love/lust with the Deathscythe pilot. His own hands were itching to dive into the silken mass, even if several bugs were inhabiting it. Heero had his own amount of anger towards the blond princess. On the way to the drugstore, Heero had been thinking up numerous ways to get the blond girl back.

Removing his shirt, Duo stepped into the tub and sat down. As soon as he sat, he decided he didn't want to ruin his pants, and he was too lazy to grab old clothes. So he sat in the tub, clad in only a pair of white cotton boxers, with his back facing Heero. A small part of him was hoping that Heero would take notice, but another part, a physical part, was beginning to burn as the itching sensation began to return. "Today Heero," He said gruffly.

With his heart sinking, Heero nodded even though Duo couldn't see. He set up the contents, reading through the directions carefully as he began working the shampoo into Duo's hair.

Threading his fingers through the soft mass, Heero closed his eyes briefly as he marveled at it's texture. When he opened them, Heero noticed that the chestnut mass was highlighted with blond strands. A natural, beautiful color. He wondered if Relena had given him head lice on purpose...

"That bitch did it on purpose," Duo growled. As if reading Heero's thoughts. "I'll get her back. I'm going to shave her head like a monkey."

A small smile curled at Heero's lips, but of course, Duo couldn't see it. "Hn."

Sucking in a deep breath, Duo sighed. He didn't know what he was doing until he felt a hand slap his own hand. "Itai! What're you doing Heero?" Duo brought his hand down and rubbed it; the flesh turning a bright pink.

"You can't touch you're hair."

"Hmph." Duo crossed his arms across his chest, slowly going insane as the itchiness continued. "Argh! Scratch it Heero!" Duo twisted his head around, causing Heero's fingers to scratch against the designated area. "Harder!"

Heero scratched harder, but his body took Duo's command the wrong way-his cock began to stir. Shutting his eyes, Heero swallowed thickly as he continued to lather Duo's hair.

~3 hours later~

Duo sat in the bathtub, his hands gripping the sides until his knuckles turned white. Heero had finished his hair a half-an-hour ago, and he was now removing the bed-sheets and pillow-cases from his room. Along with all his clothing and towels.

So here he was, stranded in the bathtub with a sick smelling shampoo lathered in his hair. The itching hadn't stopped but he knew he would be eating lead if he even tried to scratch. He couldn't even sneak a scratch, knowing that nothing got pass the Perfect Soldier.

He tried whistling, singing, anything to distract himself, but nothing was working. He stared up at the water stained ceiling, glaring and pouting the entire time. "This sucks!" Duo sucked in a deep breath and looked around the bathroom. His eyes lit up when it fell across a small doujinshi, tucked away in the back of the hamper.

Figuring that it was Quatre's-since the blond was the only one who emptied the hamper- Duo fished it out and examined the cover. He was surprised, however, when there were two boys on the cover-one with a long braid, and the other with short hair-looking a lot like him and Heero.

A feral grin crept across his face as he looked up at the door to make sure Heero was busy. Satisfied that Heero wasn't around, he flipped open the book to see the braided boy sitting on a bed, staring at the back of the short-haired boy. Deciding to name the braided one Duo, and the other one Heero, Duo read through the doujinshi with a wicked smile.

As he flipped through the pages, Duo felt his body beginning to get aroused. His eyes roamed across Heero's body, knowing that if he had seen Heero in the flesh, that's exactly what the Wing pilot would look like.

The itching sensation in his hair vanished as his hand crept into his boxers. The doujinshi fell to the floor, forgotten, as Duo's hand wrapped around his cock. The pictures played back in his mind as his eyes slid shut, stroking the burning flesh as he pictured Heero's hand on his arousal.

The only problem Duo had with the doujinshi was, Heero had taken Duo, and Duo wanted to be buried in Heero. He bit his lower lip as he suppressed a groan, his mind providing him with his own visions of Heero; sprawled beneath him and moaning as he rammed his cock into him repeatedly.

His thumb rubbed over the tip, gathering the moisture as he brought his thumb to his lips. He licked at his excitement, hand quickly returning as he squeezed his flesh, running his hand up and down. He could see Heero's eyes in his mind, pleading with him to take him harder; harder and faster. His hand moved more furiously along his length, unable to suppress the low moans which escaped his throat.

A sharp intake of breath crashed through his fantasy. Turning his head, with his hand still around his cock, Duo met wide blue eyes. "Heero..." Duo moaned. His hand still moved along his length, and Duo's eyes ran over Heero's body. Violet-eyes fell upon the huge bulge in Heero's pants and a lusty grin fell on his lips. "C'mere Heero." Duo licked his lips, eyes locking with Heero's as he stepped forward. "I've got a free hand for you."

Entranced by the beauty in front of him, Heero's legs carried him towards the beautiful boy.

"Strip," Duo ordered. He, himself, slipped out of his boxers as Heero yanked off his clothing.

Spreading his legs, Duo motioned for Heero to sit between him. His hand released his arousal as Heero's bare flesh pressed against his chest.

"Mmmm, you're so soft Heero..." Duo whispered the words across Heero's shoulder, kissing and licking at the warm flesh.

Duo rubbed his arousal against Heero's bottom as his hands trailed down, wrapping around Heero's stiffened manhood. The hard flesh burned in his hand as he began stroking the stoic boy. Duo lowered his lips to Heero's neck, sucking and licking the tender flesh. His free hand washed over Heero's body, climbing up and down until it settled for squeezing his hardened nipple.

Heero gasped as Duo's fingers twisted around the nub, and his arousal twitched within Duo's hand. He pushed his hips forward, craving more contact with Duo's hand. Moaning, Heero's own hands covered Duo's, stroking himself faster as waves of ecstasy coursed through him. "Nnnnnn! Duo...." Heero moaned Duo's name over and over, thrusting his hips faster as the friction increased.

"Mmmm, you like that Hee-chan?" Duo breathed against his ear, sucking in the lobe as he increased speed with his hand. His own arousal pulsed against Heero's bottom, wanting to dive into the hot velvet that was so close, yet so far away.

"Yesss," Heero hissed. He threw his head back, resting on Duo's shoulder, "Uhnn, don't... stop..." An electrical shock began emanating through Heero's body, causing tingles to run along his nerves, growing more intense as Duo continued stroking him.

"Oh yeah," Duo began rubbing his length against Heero's body, seeking friction as Heero came closer to the edge. "Come for me, Heero..." Duo stroked Heero's length harshly at an even rhythm until Duo felt Heero rub his bottom against his cock.

Lifting his hips, Heero reached between his legs to grasp Duo's cock, and slammed himself onto the aching shaft.

Heero's motions were too quick for Duo to follow, and suddenly, his erection was swallowed into Heero's tight heat. They both cried out in surprise.

Heero felt his entrance burn as Duo's thick shaft penetrated him. His eyes shut tightly as pain shot through his body, chasing away the orgasm that had been approaching. It took him awhile to relax, but Duo was being patient.

It took all of Duo's control not to thrust up into Heero's body. He distracted himself by using one of his hands to turn Heero's face towards his, and plunging his tongue into the moist cavern as he resumed the stroking on Heero's cock.

Two tongues battled with each other, sliding together even as Heero's muscles relaxed against Duo's length. Without breaking the kiss, Duo began to slowly thrust into Heero, while Heero moaned into his mouth.

Breaking the kiss, Heero twisted his body-without Duo's cock leaving him-and looked into Duo's passion filled eyes. The feeling of Duo's cock inside of him, thrusting in and out of him slowly, was driving him mad with desire. He rocked back against Duo, meeting him thrust for thrust; both of them staring into each others eyes, never breaking contact.

Duo moaned low in his throat as he plungened his cock in and out of Heero's entrance. Heero's hands were resting on his shoulders, gripping him tightly, and his own hands sat on Heero's waist. "You're... so... tight..." Duo groaned. He leaned forward and captured Heero's lips with his own; pounding more quickly into Heero's entrance.

Heero cried out in pleasure as Duo's cock brushed against his prostate. His lips tore away from Duo's as his head fell back and Duo's hands trailed up to keep Heero from falling over. The Wing pilot rode the Deathscythe pilot erratically, driving Duo's cock harder and faster into him with every thrust.

Incoherent moans were leaving the normally quiet boys lips, turning Duo on more and more. He could feel Heero's nails digging into his shoulders, but he couldn't even feel the pain. Using his left arm to prop Heero up, his right hand trailed down to wrap around Heero's swollen arousal.

"Duo!" Heero moaned. He slammed onto Duo as hard and as fast as he could, wave after wave of ecstasy racing through him. He felt fire run along from his groin, racing up to his erection, and as the thick cock inside of him pushed against his prostate again, white-hot heat exploded from his erection; splashing across Duo's stomach.

The clamping muscles around Duo's flesh squeezed and caressed him in every way. With his hand still milking Heero's essence from his cock, Duo thrust into the boy one last time before euphoria enveloped him. Blinding pleasure coursed through his body, blowing away what was left of his mind, and filling his partner with his sticky nectar. "Heero!" Duo leaned forward again, reaching for Heero's lips as he kissed the boy fiercely; he could feel his seed pour out of him.

With his body trembling, Heero's tongue continued to dance along with Duo's until the braided boy pulled away. Both they're bodies were covered in a thin layer of sweat, still feeling the aftershocks of their orgasms, Heero allowed a soft and rare smile to cross his lips.

Returning the smile, Duo leaned back and pulled Heero forward. He pushed back Heero's damp hair, running his fingers across his smooth cheek.

Purring contentedly, Heero buried his face in the crook of Duo's neck and closed his eyes. He was completely uncaring of where he had fallen asleep, as long as Duo kept his arms wrapped around him.

And of course, Duo kept his arms around him.

~3 days later~

Slipping into Relena's bedroom, a tall man dressed in black smiled a wicked grin. His violet eyes flashed with mischief as the moonlight set off the blond girls pale features.

Relena Darlian was snuggled tightly within her pink comforter, completely unaware of an evil Shinigami lurking in her room. If she had been aware of the perpetrator, she would have seen a pair of silver scissors glittering in the mans hands.

The Vice Foreign Minister was deep in fantasy land. Dorothy Catalonia was asking for her hand in marriage, expressing her words of love and devotion, and saying that she was awfully proud of the little stunt she pulled on Duo. Even while she was sleeping, a small smile graced her seemingly innocent face.

Innocence she was not.

While she was at an orphanage, donating money, one of the children had given her head lice. It was such an embarrassing thing, one that she wished no one would find out about. But when Duo had asked to use her brush, she thought, if she had to suffer, so would Duo. So she passed the little bugs along... She had been up all day laughing about it.

When she woke up the next morning, laughing was the last thing she wanted to do. Her beautiful golden hair was no more. Blotches of black hair dye stained various parts of her clipped hairdo. The golden/black strands were no longer than an inch, and a message was marked on the mirror in front of her.

'Mess with the best, die like the rest' [1]

After Duo's escapade~

"Hee-chan! I'm home!" Duo headed for his bedroom; slipping out of his black attire and pulling on a pair of comfortable sweatpants.

They had decided to wait awhile before they shared rooms with each other-Heero was afraid of getting head lice.

Heading over to Heero's room, Duo pushed open the door and looked around for him. But Heero's room was empty. "Heero?! Are you home?"

A muffled sound was heard from the bathroom and Duo grinned like the Cheshire cat. He pulled open the bathroom door, hoping to catch Heero in the middle of his shower. Instead, he was greeted with the sight of Heero sitting in the bathtub, with the same gunk Duo had in his hair a few days ago.

Duo's jaw dropped open, his eyes sparkling with laughter.

"Omae o korosu!" Heero growled, seeing the laughter in his lovers eyes. His hand reached into his medicated hair to scratch an itchy spot.

[1] A line from Hackers... but you all probably knew that ne?

Okay, this was really stupid but I had fun writing it. I've never seen a fic where Duo had head lice before... especially since his hair is so long... ^_^;; I'm evil and I'm stupid... but I thought it was funny. ^_^;; Please let me know what you think. ^________^


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